Yes, we’re in Viking season, when they came they Thor they conquered… and this weekend all longboats lead to York, and the Jorvik Viking Festival.
OK, well there probably wasn’t a season for pillaging.
With the hardy Norsemen pillaging all year round, and all over Europe and into North Africa and the Middle East.
And to these islands with the northernmost, the Shetlands (closer to Norway than London), understandably the most Viking of them all.
With the locals still claiming Norsehood from when they were part of Fjordland before they were given away as a dowry.
Helly aa good Shetland
Now the good people of those islands, including our old neighbours from my second time around in my alma mater city of Aberdeen, are just clearing their heads.
After their own Up Helly Aa festival.
When they all get out their Viking robes and burn a ship.
But for fans of the Vikings, the horn-helmeted show has moved south to Yorkshire.
Where swords and seaxes are being sharpened, shields reinforced and beards groomed (a daily activity for your bearded Bandanaman).
Although alas the Son and Heir has not inherited the hirsute gene.
York, York, so good
And that went against him when he auditioned to be an extra for the Vikings TV series, shot in my old stomping ground in Wicklow, once a Viking stronghold.
Tents are also being prepared in York as the once Viking town braces itself for the welcome return of its 9th century raiders.
Which is why the city will be hoaching with Norse warriors, craftspeople and traders all arriving for JORVIK Viking Festival 2023.
Claiming itself as Europe’s largest Viking festival.
With well over 40,000 visitors each year, the city centre will be taken over by living history encampments.
There is a combat and display arena and much more for nine days.
All celebrating the Viking people who arrived in 866 and settled here for the next 200 years.
From the Norse’s mouth
Festival manager Gareth Henry takes up the story: ‘This year, we’re taking a look at how the Vikings were perceived by others.
“In our Battle Spectacular on Saturday 18 February.
‘With a story inspired by the Arab writer Ibn Fadlan.
“His accounts of the encounter are one of the few contemporary accounts of Viking traders in the 10th century.
Helpfully Gareth has given us a rundown of the highlights of when they came Thor conquered.
With the whiskers awards obviously drawing my eye:
Hair-raising competitions
- JORVIK Viking Festival Best Beard Competition. Festival Arena, St Helen’s Square. 11.00am Saturday 11 February.
This year’s Best Beard competition has two rounds – the first at 11am for homemade beards of any description particularly for the hairles.
The second at 11.15am is for those who have naturally cultivated impressive chin forests! - The Annual Strongest Viking Competition, Eye of York (by Clifford’s Tower). Saturday 18 February at 11.15am.
You’ll be tested on hammer-holding, leg-wrestling, hand-to-hand combat and more. - March to Coppergate, Saturday 18 February starting from Dean’s Park at 1.30pm. They’ve come from near and far to muster in their fearsome armies.
Recommended viewing spots include the Piazza outside York Minster’s South Door, St Helen’s Square and Parliament Street.
The packed programme of events also includes talks and lectures, crafting workshops, an encampment, traders’ market and much more.
And rock your Fringe
Other themed events form a Festival Fringe, including a retelling of the apocalypse.
Told through wrestling, Mythos: Ragnarok, which is being performed at York Barbican on Friday 17 February.
And a new Augmented Reality story created by Geostories.
It combines fact and fantasy, available to download free from the iStore or Google Play.
And if that doesn’t make you feel Viking and glad that they came Thor conquered, then nothing will.