So when the British decided to send Napoleon to somewhere he couldn’t escape from, they chose a marathon trip to St Helena in the South Atlantic.
After all the drama of his life before Old Boney would have been forgiven for being quite at peace in the remote island south-west of modern-day South Africa.
Life is still peaceful on the British protectorate and slow with Jonathan, with whom readers here will be familiar, its most famous modern-day resident.
On account of his longevity, the 192-year-old tortoise having seen everything that has ever happened on St Helena over the last century and half since coming here from Britain.
The slow lane: Jonathan
Jonathan won’t be worried then about hearing the thuds of humans running past him at Plantation House (the poor oul’ fella can’t see, you see).
All part of the biggest thing which is set to happen on St Helena next year.
We’ve raced off in different directions, but as we look back on Scalextric at 70 and forward to Monaco, wherever you are now Paul DiFazio I trust you’re still on a fast track.
I used to always look forward to visiting my cousin Greg’s part of Glasgow.
But big reveal here I enjoyed going to his neighbour Paul more.
Box of tricks: Childhood memories
As I’m sure he did on account of Paul owning that most sought-after Seventies toy Scaletrix.
Which no matter how much badgering I could never get my parents to buy for me.
Now Scaletrix allowed us to transport ourselves in our imaginations.
If the exertions of Scotland’s Bruce Mouat have pricked your interest this last week for a new sport to follow then here’s where to curl up and enjoy this winter pastime.
Chances are that for most of us the strange sport of curling with its stones, brushes and dartboards only comes onto our radars every four years at the Winter Olympics.
But long before football became Scotland’s national team sport curling had a hold.
And there was indeed a rival for golf to be the Royal & Ancient game too.
Championed by one Queen Victoria.
We are amused
Ice one: My shot at curling
The story goes that the British monarch and Empress of half the world took to the quaint Scottish game.
On a visit to Scone Palace, near Perth in 1843.
When a certain Earl of Mansfield put on a demonstration of curling on the grand ballroom floor.
And she was so taken by the sport that she granted the Caledonian Club’s name to be changed.
The show offers exquisite costumes and a vibrant celebration of tradition and culture.
The next rodeo runs from February 12-March 1.
And of course it’s not a rodeo without a cast of Country greats including Brad Paisley, Miranda Lambert, Sheryl Crowe and Ludacris.
Make a deal
Horn of plenty: Your Bandanaman
Now over to our friends from Visit San Antonio for an update on where we are in getting a direct flight.
From these islands to the fifth biggest city in the Oo Es of Eh.
With President and Chief Executive Marc Anderson revealing that their timeline of the next year has been extended because of the introduction of a Frankfurt service with Condor.
‘We’ll revisit the UK [flights] in 2026,” Anderson said.
My kinda stop-off
Telling us that we still have a “very convenient” journey to San Antonio via Houston or Dallas.
While our adventure took us through the hub that is Chicago which is our kinda town, people who.
But that’s another story and one we’re happy to share.
It’s just another staging post on the Tartan Army‘s world tour, and no doubt we’ll be coming down the road singing No Scotland, no Boston Footie Party.
We have, of course, been here before in Beantown, where Scotland’s first two games against Haiti and Morocco will be played.
With Scots early pioneers out to the American colonies.
And obviously being a Scot I got to walk this Son Of Liberty’s footsteps.
A Scot’s Swansong
James, I discovered, was quickly identified by Samuel Adams and the leaders as important to the cause.
Through his work at the mercantile house Thaxter & Son and their dealings with the sale of tea.
James, or Swannie as he was probably never known but would have been if he had been a footballer, brought his Scottish ways with him to New England.
I learned that he became a member of the St. Andrew’s Lodge of Freemasons, the Scots Charitable Society of Boston, and enlisted in the Revolutionary Army.
Ya dancer: The Boys in Blue
Where this Scottish soldier rose to the rank of colonel for the Battle of Bunker Hill.
And also held positions on the Massachusetts Board of War and Legislature.
My own time working as a busboy at Guadalaharry’s in Quincy Market and an ice cream shop in Faneuil Hall.
Stars in Stripes: Boston, cradle of the Revolution
Swannie, of course, would have been too busy fighting the English, and no doubt some Scots with the Brtitish Army, to have concerned himself with such pastimes as football.
Although it was a game, having been played back in the Old World since the 1500s with the oldest ball housed in Stirling Castle, not far from Swannie’s Fife fiefdom, from 1540.
Coming down the road: SuperMac Scott McTominay
Even if organised or Association football, from where we get the word soccer, had not taken hold in Scotland until 1873, 43 years after Swannie’s death in Paris.
Scotland’s famous Tartan Army will, of course, get a warm welcome from Bostonians.
And we will doubtless repay our hosts by supporting the Boys in Stars and Stripes when they play.
Just as Greenock native Ed McIlvenny did when he captained America to victory over England at the 1950 World Cup.
And there’s a trivia question for you and money you can take from your English friends in a bet.
America The Bountiful
In with the bricks: Your bartender
All of which trips down memory lane lead us neatly to our modern-day American friends at Brand USA.
Who hae put together a handy guide for footie fans for next summer.
Which celebrates this sports-mad city’s rich legacy.
Inside TD Garden, home of the Boston Bruins and Boston Celtics.
And would-be sportscasters can sit at a replica New England Sports Network (NESN) desk, where visitors can ‘Be the Broadcaster.’
This time: Scotland’s World Cup odyssey
So you can practise: ‘And Andy Robertson makes history as the first Scot to lift the World Cup.’
For those of who will go native, of course, there is the hub of American soccer fans, The Banshee.
A 14 television sports bar across two floors where the Tartan Army will converge.
Because No Scotland, no Boston Footie Party.
The wailing Banshee
Off your rocker: Boston Airport
This is where, The Banshee, the American Outlaws (supporters of the U.S. national football team) congregate as well as fans of other major sports leagues.
And on special celebrity bartending nights, local athletes pour drinks at this mainstay Dorchester-based Irish pub.
Now what Swannie and his pals would think of the America of today we can only imagine, but we’d say pride would be their foremost emotion.
Particularly as the tournament coincides with America 250, and Brand USA is spotlighting 250 things to do.
Across the US through a themed content series.
And as with all else with transatlantic travel from these islands to the Oo Es of Eh, we always advise travelling through Ireland.
And Aer Lingus with pre-clearance where you can get a sample return flight for a week, covering both matches from £963.58.
IT seems unimaginable now that basketball that has created more Afro-American idols than any other was once a white preserve, so it is worth marking the first black pioneer of the NBA 75 years on.
Charles ‘Chuck’ Cooper may not have the global adulation.
Of a Michael Jordan, Kobe Bryant, LeBron James, Steph Curry, Magic Johnson or Shaquille O’Neal.
But were you to ask any one of those black colossuses of sport for his contribution to the sport.
And their passage into it they would as one place him on the highest pedestal.
King James: LeBron James
Because on this day back in 1950 the Pittsburgh native became the first Afro-American to play in the NBA.
We found an Aer Lingus flight from our home airport here in Edinburgh through Dublin with pre-clearance for a sample week’s return dates this month from £668.40.
