Up there with those to avoid in life, like taxmen and Ed Sheeran, are those who say Venice is dying… well, on this, their 1600th anniversary year, here’s to the next 1600.
Firstly, the world’s most famous city on a lagoon, has thrived for 1600 years already through plague, foe and the elements.
And despite the doom mongers’ prophecies Venice is actually better placed for the next 1600 years than any of the 1600 before.
No, not because of that picture of that dolphin returning to the Grand Canal which proved the effect of climate change.
No, that was a fake. But because, surprise, surprise, the Venetians know more about preserving their unique way of life than anybody else.
The celebrations have been in full flow since late last month and will run until March 25 next year.
So plenty of time to plan for Veniceophiles (OK I made that term up) to return to a city we have been away from too long.
We return too to the Chronican Altinate (no, me neither) and diarist Marin Sanudo for detail on Venice’s beginnings.
Sanudo referenced the San Giacomo di Rialto as being the first church, begun on March 24, 421.
These days, of course, we have the internet to go to.
And as mia moglie will tell you I’m always happy to let someone else to do the heavy lifting.
Just follow the Venezia calendar on their site for a host of cultural and historical events which you can follow.
He was Corfu’s most famous son but how will the Ionian island remember Prince Philip?
Hail Hellas
Well, probably not at all as ‘Phil the Greek’ as he was rather impertinently referred to by cheeky commoners lived all of 18 months in the island off Albania.
The Turks saw to that sentencing his Dad Andrew to death before he escaped with his son in an orange box.
Anyone for a Greek dance?
The Prince of Greece, unsurprisingly, had no longing to return particularly after finding a warmer welcome with the Windsors, of Windsor.
Wares of Greeks
And he was to say when asked: ‘I certainly never felt nostalgic about Greece. A grandfather assassinated and a father condemned to death does not endear me to the perpetrators.’
That was then and this is now and we’re all jolly good friends, ourselves and the Greeks.
Right down to the fact that they have a cricket pitch, the very essence of English culture, in the centre of Corfu Town.
And we’re busy courting the Hellenes, and they us, particularly as a possible green light country under the outline of the Global Travel Task Force.
Global Task Force
On which topic how do we feel about said Global Task Force.
And again I find myself in tune with my friends at the Scottish Passenger Agents Association who are lobbying our politicians north of the border here to get on board.
Joanne Dooey, President of the SPAA, speaks for all of us, travel professionals and travel providers alike when she says: ‘Currently, the advice being given today is for travellers to and from England, and in our meetings next week with the Scottish Aviation Working Group we will be urging that Scotland follows suit.’
While she also raises an issue we have long flagged up.
She said: ‘We have some initial reservations on cost and availability of testing, the traffic light system and how vaccination passes will work operationally.
‘Our chief concern is the requirement for a PCR test and the costs associated with this. PCR testing is currently an expensive option which will place financial strain on families who travel together.
‘We would like to see the cost of this driven down or alternative forms of acceptable testing such as antigen and lateral flow.
Your boat will come in
‘The traffic light system has to have clarity and we all need to know the data which will place each country in green, amber or red and importantly what will trigger the move from one category to another.
‘This should be an internationally agreed system as currently this is only one side of the equation and travellers also need to know all the regulations for entry to their destination country.
‘And we’re very keen to hear how the digital vaccination pass will work in practice.’
It’s a deal
All of which brings us back to what we should be looking out for if we do we want to get out to Corfu.
And blue and white naturally
It is an island we know well from spending our first married days there with highlights including a dab at water skiing (or drinking), doughnuts and a flirtation (on his part) with the hotel keyboardist.
Corfu is surprisingly green and has its quirks such as that cricket pitch and the ubiquitous scary-looking Greek monks, though with the types of beards I’ve been trying to grow for 30 years.
The Scary One is never far away though clicking her scissors just in case.
When Christ shall come, with shout of acclamation. And take me home what joy shall fill my heart. Then I shall bow in humble adoration. And then proclaim, my God how great thou art – ElvisPresley
And it is worth remembering that Elvis first learned to sing in church.
And during his residencies in Las Vegas he would invite his friends up to his room for impromptu Gospel singalongs
It’s better to imagine Elvis’s heart being joyful at the moment God came to take him home that day in Graceland.
Whenever God shines his light on me. Opens up my eyes so I can see. When I look up in the darkest night. And I know that everything is going to be all right – Van Morrison/Cliff Richard
And aren’t we all God’s children anyway even Van the Man, the grumpiest man in rock?
Religion is all around you in Belfast where Van is known to put on occasional jazz cabaret shows at the Europa Hotel.
Guide me, O thou great Redeemer, Pilgrim through this barren land. I am weak but thou art mighty. Hold me with thy powerful hand. Bread of Heaven, Bread of Heaven. Feed me till I want no more. – Bryn Terfel, Cardiff
And Cwm Rhondda (The Rhondda) is the unofficial anthem of Wales.
Easter in Jerusalem would normally be a throng of pilgrims.
But it has been reassuring, if a little surreal, to see masked worshippers following the Path of the Cross.
But it does give us a sense, both metaphorical, and real, of revival, of resurrection.
Israel, and Britain for that matter, have been the great success stories of the vaccine roll-out.
The Promised Land has vaccinated half of their population
While 1 in 12 Britons have had both jabs, although there are more than six times as many of us.
Common cause
But let’s celebrate both our countries and talk up the preliminary discussions of the UK-Israel route opening up from August.
Yes, May 17, has been mooted for a Travel review but late summer remains more realistic.
A British Government source was quoted in the Sunday Times.
They said: ‘There will be a system of travel corridors to green-list countries with good vaccination rates. Israel, here we come!’
So where are we with our Israeli friends who we touched base with at the digital World Travel Market at the end of last year.
Well, several airlines have added limited routes and slowly increased flights in June and July.
Easy does it
That would then be in line with an August return for Britons so keep an eye on all our old favourites.
EasyJet offers two nights room only at the American Colony Jerusalem on July 2.
Leaving from Luton (hint to our Government to get a move on) £396pp, which means £792 for two.
While Virgin Holidays has tempted us of a Scottish persuasion, and now living up here in Braveheartland.
With seven nights at the Waldorf Astoria Jerusalem from £3381pp (well, you deserve it) for October 26.
Kayak is many a traveller’s second point of contact (after jimmurtytraveltraveltravel.com obviously). And what about the Queen of Sheba for my Queen of Sheba?
The Dead Sea
Three nights and flight at the Hilton Eilat Queen of Sheba Hotel three nights and flight for £1,079
And, of course, our friends at G Adventures who have been trying to get me out to Israel these past few years (you have, you have, you have).
G whizz
They have 15 days from £999 Jordan and Israel Adventure from £1954, valid on December 10 (plenty of time to be super-vaccinated). And this was £2299!
I always keep my watch set at the time of the last country I’ve been to so today that’ll be the Czech Republic.
The idea is to keep something of that destination and wanderlust with me though it can cause problems in the morning.
Beer O’Clock in Zatec
My strange habit all chimes with the Czechs, of course, with their love of an astronomical clock.
Prague‘s biggest attraction, in the Old Town Square obvs but also the clock in Hoptown, Zatec, and its homage to beer.
Scot late the Great
You’re late… but that’s OK in Edinburgh
Balmoral Hotel, Edinburgh: And, of course, today I’ve been all over the place, and logging on for work that was a full month ago.
Now the fastidious and ever-so-decent people of Edinburgh look after people like me.
By setting their clock three minutes fast to allow people rushing for their train at nearby Waverley Station enough time.
Set in the New Town, staring across Princes Street Gardens and up to Edinburgh Castle it also allows you more time to take it all in.
Philly’s hour of need
Billydelphia
Philadelphia City Hall, Philadelphia: And it will come as little surprise to you that I turned up for my Zoom meeting from Washington DC five hours early.
I make only a few apologies for resharing Philadelphia’s Curse of Billy Penn because clocks and times give me that opportunity today.
The 21-year curse on Philly‘s sports teams arose because of the construction of One Liberty Hall.
It exceeded the height of Billy’s statue atop City Hall… a real no, no.
It was all resolved when a statuette was affixed to the final beam topping off the Comcast Cener, now the city’s tallest building.
And the Phillies took baseball’s World Series
Tenerife timing
Give me a bell: Tenerife
Iglesia de la Concepcion, San Cristobal de La Laguna: You’ll be breathless after saying all this.
And breathless from the steps, particularly if you’ve been hiking through rain forests and hills on your CanariaWays trip.
But the views are spectacular. Just don’t ring it too early. Too late.
Ancient times
Time goes slowly: Im Petra
Petra, Jordan: And it may look like a temple to you and me but it’s actually a Treasury.
The same thing to the Nabateans.
It’s also though a timepiece with coded messages.
You won’t need Indiana Jones to decode them though.
Zuhair, G Adventures, expert man on the ground will give you the full lowdown… and Jordan Jimmy will do the rest.
Ben O’Clock
The Elizabeth Tower, Westminster, London: And, of course the tower with the most famous clockface in the world.
Only everyone thinks it’s called Big Ben.
But that is the name of the largest of its five bells.
So who was Ben? Well, either ‘Big’ Ben Hall, the first Commissioner of Works or the boxer Benjamin Caunt.
And our breakaway party from our trip to Padova
Look at the head on that: Zatec, Czech Republuc
The Dead Sea
Mt Nebo, Jordan
