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And as Inter Milan and PSG meet tonight in Munich in the Champions League final here’s a Danke for der German football memories.

Not that I’d wish my early experiences on supporters or neutrals converging on the pride of Bavaria.

A fresh-faced pilgrim to the Oktoberfest I resolved to visit the cathedral of football that was the Olympiastadion.

To see the mighty Bayern Munich face Nuremberg in a fiercely-fought Bavarian derby.

Inside the ground I, of course, used what little German I had, Muller, Beckenbauer, Hoeness and they their Scottish knowledge, Stein.

Only here for der blows

Only the duelling didn’t stop there.

As I found out when I got back to the Hofbrau House where I encountered two footballing frauleins fighting.

And proceeded in true noble spirit to split them apart.

Only to get punched in the nose for my troubles.

And, to this day, I insist that it was their boyfriends, who had entered the row, who delivered the bloody blow.

With ambulances on hand, well this is Oktoberfest, the hospital patched me up and sent me on my way.

Only I couldn’t remember the name of the campsite and was grateful for the taxi driver’s local knowledge.

And for taking me to the biggest site in the city.

Where the Aussies and Kiwis, my Top Deck companions for the week, took up annual residence.

German lessons

The story, of course, ought to have ended there.

Only a hospital envelope arrived at my family home a month later addressed to James J Murty.

And, of course, my dad sharing my name but for the G initial would see it as his right to open my mail.

And he gave me a lecture about high jinx and reminded me that the bill was on me.

G’day my Beerfest buddies

As a thrill-seeking teen I, of course, ignored Pater’s advice.

And the high jinx continued up at Aberdeen particularly when the Aussies turned up unexpectedly one night and stayed a year.

But that and the next year’s Oktoberfest and singing on the bandstand are another story.

Fans for the memories

That brush with the Bavarians, of course, wasn’t about to put me off Germany.

And I have been fortunate enough to return regularly over the years.

And even tour the heartland of German football, the Ruhr

As well as Dortmund and the German Football Museum where I got pictured with the European Cup.

Alas, those Bayern Munich fans, wherever they are, will not get the pleasure this year.

Of seeing their favourites lift ‘Old Big Ears’.

But they can console themselves with their rich history to call on.

Of which I am part… Danke for der German football memories.

And despite the love-in for Madrid there is a match to be played out tonight and an authentic football base to be sated… so let’s give out a Ruhr Champions roar.

Borussia Dortmund v Real Madrid is truly a clash of styles and cultures.

Dortmund, the fans-owned people’s club from the German industrial heartland with the Yellow Wall at their back.

And in the white corner, Real, the King’s and State’s club with the tapas and rioja guzzlers in the corporate boxes backing them.

Of course, I’ve known about Real, just like you, as long as I’ve known about football.

On my account because Los Blancos had won the last of their five-in-a-row European Cups in 1960.

In front of a 137,000 crowd at Hampden, Glasgow, which included Alex Ferguson… and my Dear Old Dad.

Pin it on Dortmund

Of course when the Spaniards came to Glasgow to play the clubs here it was always a big deal.

But it was a night in the early 90s where I formed an interest in their opponents tonight, Borussia Dortmund.

When a German reporter on the local Dortmund paper entered the press box.

And started handing out club pins for the Scots, myself included, reporting on that night’s game with Celtic.

It wasn’t just the start of a friendship between both press packs but also between both clubs despite Celtic overturning the Cologne first leg lead that night.

Legendary players transferred between the clubs, Murdo Macleod to the Ruhr Valley.

And Paul Lambert, fresh from winning the European Cup with Dortmund, to Parkhead.

Wrong step for ex-players

Tonight Dortmund will try and repeat that feat and it would be just as big an upset as it was back in 1997 when they defeated another European behemoth Juventus, of Italy.

Now every club holds their legends dear, and are suspicious of those, who hotfoot it for bigger riches and especially to rivals Bayern Munich.

Which is how it was when Dortmund star Robert Lewandowski returned from Munich to play his old team.

And was told that he had to walk down the unlucky steps into the ground as he was now ‘one of them.’

Kloppelganger

One who is undoubtedly ‘one of us’, or a Dortmunder, is Jurgen Klopp, who is held in high regard for his time there.

So much so that they even have a doppelganger taking the tours around the stadium.

In best Ruhr tradition food and drink complement the football fun of visiting the changing rooms and the home dugout.

And you will be able to drink the local beer, sausages and meaty fun pitchside.

And hear how Kloppie’s wife would bake cakes for the team until his successor Killjoy Thomas Tuchel put a stop to it.

Here we go Dortmund

Stand too in the Yellow Wall which will certainly prompt a visit for a match which is considerably cheaper than at Real, or in English football.

Football fans around Europe who haven’t enjoyed the delights of Dortmund before will invariably do so this month at Euro 2024.

And if they have the stomach visit the German Football Museum.

And marvel at the stories behind their four World Cup triumphs and three Euro titles (to date).

Of course they’ll have a say in this year’s tournament (despite Scotland’s imminent victory in the opener) and if they do win it you’ll hear the Ruhr Champions Roar.