I’m looking forward to having a beautiful young woman lay her hands all over me… and maybe later I’ll have a massage
Some people need a humour transplant.
Back in the day when I edited Ireland’s then award-winning Travel section I had some massage fun in a Barbados article.
Only by the time it got to the inhouse clickbait site it was edited out.
As it didn’t sit well with The Third Wave of Feminism overseers.
Who missed the point totally as Barbados is gloriously irreverent and saucy.
And which is why this Scot just clicked with the Bajans.
And I will have to work off this belly
Now you’re nice and relaxed
I’m floating on air as I write this post after being a guinea pig for my daughter as she keeps her skills up.
And I’m thinking of my five fave places where I’ve just laid back and thought of..
Acting all goofy in Orlando
Animated in Orlando
Orlando: Travel trips often throw the most unlikely people together but I found that I had a lot in common with Finnish Paula.
Not least when our hotel in Orlando mistook Mrs Murray for my wife (lucky her).
And to this day, and today is that day I greet her as Missus.
A massage is just the thing after cricking your neck and being twisted this way and that on a Disney World rollercoaster.
And this drink Becherovka is a healing potion
The Czech Republic: And it’ll come as little surprise that in this land of spas and wellness that you’ll get a great massage.
Especially in the Spa Triangle.
Watch though whose dressing gown you pick or you’ll have a small Japanese woman shrieking at you.
And a swim will relax the muscles
Bur it’s hot, hot, hot. And so is the weather outside.
The Western Med: It’s often been said that I need my head looked at.
And who better than a cruise and what better than an Indian head massage?
And for a minute I thought I was going to end up with a revolving head like Clunk from Stop the Pigeon.
Sweat off the rum and food
Barbados: I’m guided as always by my friends and Travel professionals Michael and Niamh and Bronagh.
Who helped to prompt this tour around massage destinations.
By flagging up the Irish-owned Sandy Lane on the island’s Platinum Coast.
Without having to sell off a vital organ to pay for it.
MEET YOU IN THE PARLOUR