The Hungarian phrasebook has been updated since Monty Python days, not that there was ever the call to hear my Budapest hovercraft is full of eels.
Because for the next four days it will be the leisurely drift of pleasure liners out of my InterContinental Hotel window onto the River Danube.
All of which gets you in the mood for a swim and that is why my little mermaid has brought me here.
Only the blue Danube is for cruising and boozing and we will indulge… for research purposes you understand.
Now if the grand old river which winds majestically through the heart of Europe is the Hungarian capital’s artery.
Dip your toe in
Then the Szechenyi Baths are its beating heart.
With its 15 indoor baths and three outdoor pools, saunas, steam rooms, a rooftop spa greenhouse.
And one we’ll definitely sign up for is the 45-minute beer spa.
But that is for another day.
King of the castle
Having come in on the two and a half hour Ryanair red eye from Edinburgh.
On our loveholidays city break we need a reviving shower as we like them in the InterCon.
Before crossing the Danube from our Pest base for the Buda Castle.
Not that we’re recovered enough to tackle the heights.
Up, up and away
Instead we have that funicular in our sights.
And a goulash soup on the terrace and Magyar beer… we deserve it.
All served by the friendliest Hungarians, none of whom bristle when I say my Budapest hovercraft is full of eels.
We have come to Budapest from Edinburgh with loveholidays and Ryanair staying at the Intercontinental on the Danube.
For four days for £1,099.
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