Africa, America, Countries, Europe, Ireland, UK

How happy on the mountain

How happy on the mountain are the feet of He who brings good news… that today is International Mountain Day.

And yes, of course, while there is a day of the year for almost everything, our mountains are there every day.

It took the United Nations until 2003 though before they advanced our peaks for an International Day.

Of course being from the mountainous top half of this septic island they call Britain I’d been to the roof and looked down.

You dancer: In the Pyrenees

And admired Scotland’s valleys and glens and looked out and wondered of the view from other peaks.

Nothing as adventurous or backbreaking as mountaineering, or bagging Munros, those Scottish peaks, of which there are 282.

Border force

Cross country: At the Austrian-German border

But leaving it to our dream makers, our holiday makers, to take us up where the air is fresh and sweet.

For some who are lucky enough to live in the mountains then gorges can be part of their daily routine.

And so it is nothing to locals who cross the border through a mountain gate between Austrian Tirol and the Bavarian Alps.

While others will trek across the Alps into northern Italy.

The mountains have long been routes through which people have traversed for trade, adventure, or in flight.

Although, as we’ve tracked already in these pages the most famous fleeing family most certainly never climbed every mountain.

But rather the Von Trapps took the train into Italy instead.

Mountain people

Only way is up: Jungraujoch in Switzerland

The most romantic way through the mountains is of course by foot but we’ve hit the peaks in all of those… trains, planes and snowmobiles.

Trains… on the Jungfraujoch Railway, the highest train route in Europe.

Planes and helicopters in the mountains above the Grand Canyon.

By coach up the Rockies on Colorado and Graaf-Reinet in the Eastern Cape in South Africa.

In the frame: With my fellow Jim in the Pyrenees

And with half the Atlas Mountains descending on your Scooby Doo van during a rainy Ramadan.

Mountains are to be admired, of course, but to be respected too.

And we continually wonder at the skills of those who keep an eye on them when they are stirring.

And point out nonchalantly when we’re in the Pyrenees that there’s an avalanche in the distance.

Slope off on your hols

The Snowy One: Herself in Soll

This time of year is, of course, reserved for those who put planks on their feet and zig-zag down the mountains.

And whether that’s in our northern tip of Britain, my favoured ski slopes of Soll in Austria and Val D’Isere in France.

And on the dry slopes of my other land, Ireland, at Kilternan.

We’re all on the same page…

How happy on the mountain are the feet of those who bring good news.

Our dream makers, our holiday providers.

 

 

Asia, Countries, Europe, Skiing, UK

Holiskis and don’ts… and the frozen penis

Now I’m getting my Alpine gear together for my trip next month so a quick recap. Holiskis and don’ts and the frozen penis.

Yes frostbite can get you just when, and where, you don’t expect.

And that for Olympic 50km cross country skier Remi Lindholm, in the -26C chills of Beijing, means in the nether regions.

Once frostbitten

A pain in the groin: Remi Lindholm

For Finland’s Remi it was rather surprisingly and fortunately not the first time.

He had suffered the same inconvenience in Ruka in his homeland last year.

Remi said: ‘When the body parts started to warm up after the finish the pain was unbearable.’

Remi had come prepared though with a heat pack but it seems that that’s not enough to combat those temperatures or exertions.

So the best piece of advice would be not to ski a 50km Olympic race in -26C temperatures.

Blue run, run, run

Chalet La France: Val D’Isere

Just as well then that I’ll be sticking to the Blue Run in Val D’Isere.

And Ski France’s guides for what to take with you… to keep warm and safe.

Beginner’s pluck

Home and dry: Hillend, near Edinburgh

Firstly if you’ve not skied before try getting down to your local dry ski slope.

And mine is in Scotland and Ireland like me then they’re at Hillend, near Edinburgh and Kilternan, near Dublin.

If you’re lucky enough to live in The Scottish Highlands (and then you are lucky) and you have a snowy slope nearby.

You can always learn to ski when you can get there.

I’d guard though against learning with your partner after my first experiences on the snow.

Ploughing the depths

Snow business: I’ll work my way up to boarding

When I went careening into Claire in Aviemore.

And didn’t snow plough in time and left her with a multicoloured bruise.

Which was there for all to see when we assembled in the swimming pool later.

All of which tells you that your ski pants aren’t guaranteed protection against out-of-control skiers.

So yes, helmet and goggle up and get a padded ski jacket, pants and gloves.

Pride comes before a fall

Marching orders: My skiing holidays memories

Master too your fall and how to get back up.

And get on and off your gondola.

And the answer to your question: what happened to me after I’d taken Claire out of the game.

Yes, she emasculated me… giving me the Let’s Be Friends speech before the night was out.

And only a week left of our holiday too.

The worst break

And let me tell you the worst ski injury you can endure is a broken heart.

Maybe just in case though follow this. Holiskis and Don’ts and the frozen penis.