I’m a copy Kate too around the world

Everyone has their own altered reality of who they are so I admit it, I’m a copy Kate too around the world.

And aren’t we all, airbrushing here and pretending we’re somebody we’re not?

And so for this Irish-Scot, schooled in Classical Greece and Rome, with a tranche of Irish-American rellies I’ve channelled all their icons.

Now, far from wanting to come in and do a fixer’s job for the Windsors.

But I’ve always found that the best way of redressing a pile on is to send yourself up.

Altered images

And so if Kate Middleton put out a Picasso-type photo of herself and her sprogs then she could show that she can laugh at herself.

Now four score months and seven days ago (or thereabouts) I brought forth my Presidency.

See, there I am, writing an order in the White House in DC.

And, I was entitled to do so, having been given the authority by no less a figure than George Washington himself.

Now, I’ve been photographed with many an American icon over the years.

Martin Luther King, Elvis Presley, Annie Oakley and more recently Donald Trump, although he probably met them all too.

Of course, I fought too in the American Civil War.

In fact much like the Universal Soldier of Donovan’s song or the Rolling Stones Sympathy for the Devil I was there for the major events in history.

With the Archduke Franz Ferdinand and Archduchess Sophia in Sarajevo at the time of their assassination which triggered the First World War.

And spooky this, she too like Kate was of ‘common stock’

Then modern rock royalty in Cliff Richard in Portugal and R&B (that’ll be Rihanna and Bandanaman) in her native Barbados.

And danced with Judy Murray and sung with Natasha Bedingfield… you can make up your mind on those last two name drops.

Now, there’s the old saying about fake it till you make it.

Now admitting it is the first step which is why I acknowledge I’m a copy Kate around the world.

Kate though has it the other way round down Kensington Palace way as she prefers to make it till she fakes it.