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It was the standard joke but it’s changing and we can now say goodbye to newly wed, overfed and nearly dead cruise cliches.

While our cruising days in our 13 years in our ancestral Irish home were in our early 50s that’s now higher than the average cruise age.

Cruise Lines International Association’s (CLIA) latest annual passenger study has revealed that Irish cruisers are getting younger.

With the average guest age dropping to 46.3 years in 2024 from 46.7 in 2023.

On the up

The finding comes as overall Irish cruise passenger numbers increased last year.

By 11.3% to 65,000, the highest total recorded.

The Mediterranean remains their destination of choice, with 61.3% of all voyages taken.

The Caribbean came in second at 17.7%, while northern Europe was at 6.1%.

The latter scored a 25% uplift in overall journeys taken.

Representing the highest growth among the main cruise itineraries.

With an average length of a sailing is 7.9 days.

Fjord fiesta

Presented with a choice by our pals at MSC to showcase Meraviglia we opted for a cruise around the fjords.

In preference to Europe, having sailed the Western Med, and the Persian Gulf.

While I’d opted to be a landlubber in the Caribbean, Barbados and Tobago.

Now My Little Mermaid soon befriended a Fortysomethings couple on our passage around Denmark and Norway.

And had them upgraded on our hospitality.

In exchange for a crash course in His hobby, tunnelling.

Forties’ forte

Toast of the seas: My date with a Princess

Fortysomethings, and I was one once, come in all shapes and sizes.

And they have all the moves as our cruise crew can testify.

Having partied everywhere from the Med to the English Channel and the Bahamas.

While we don’t even have to leave dry dock as we like to live it up whenever the boat comes in.

Whether Princess, a Royal, a Celebrity or a Swan.

Ship shape

Love me Tender: Celebrity Cruises, Bahamas

And yes, we know that the first rule of cruising is to give Her the deference She deserves as a ship and not a boat.

Andy Harmer, CLIA UK & Ireland managing director, said: ‘Cruise is thriving among Ireland passengers.

‘The convenience and value-for-money a holiday at sea offers shining through.’

All of which means we can say goodbye to newly wed, overfed and nearly dead cruise cliches.

Countries, Cruising, Deals, Europe, Ships

You too can be an Olympian Celebrity

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And as the newly-garlanded victors begin to cash in on their triumphs here’s how you too can be an Olympian Celebrity.

And at the heart of the Olympic story too in Olympia, the site of the first Games in 776BC.

The elite cruise providers are offering a timely As Good As Gold Olympia, Greece package which will make you feel a winner.

All part of your 10-night Greek Isles & Turkey.

Spoiled and ruined: At the Acropolis in Athens

Join your bus from your ship from the island of Kerakolon for Ancient Olympia.

Now, of course, any day excursion will never be long enough to channel your inner Olympian hero.

And I can vouch. from a rushed run around the Parthenon, that any time soaking up Hellenic Classical culture is worth it.

Olympic glory

During your visit you will spend an hour and a half.

A little less than the best Marathon runners will take.

You will explore the Temple of Zeus, the temple of Hera, the shrine of Pelops, the treasury, the Palaestra and Gymnasium.

After the guided visit you will have half an hour free time.

Before you will rejoin the bus for a five-minute drive to Touris Club.

By the beard of Zeus: The Temple of Zeus

Where you will taste snacks and enjoy traditional Greek folk dances.

With your booking you can get at least 30 per cent off guests 1 and 2, and up to $200 per room to spend onboard.

Also, you can include drinks & Wi-Fi for only £59pp per day.

All roads lead from Rome

Celebrity Equinox will sail you away from Barcelona to Rome (Civitavecchia).

And on to Mykonos, Greece, Ephesus (Kusadasi), Turkey, the jewel of the Bosphorus that is Istanbul.

Santorini back in Greece, Olympia (Katakolon) and Rome (Civitavecchia).

If you can’t wait and you’ve a spare €1,448pp down the back of the sofa.

For an Ocean View you can get away from August 23-September 2.

Or there are another six alternative dates from next May to September.

So there you have it, the quest does pay off when you too can be an Olympian Celebrity.

Countries, Cruising, Deals, Europe, Ireland

Ireland Iceland Island Fireland

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The financial joke was that the difference was one letter and six months, but we’re not the only ones linking Ireland Iceland Island Fireland.

Although it has taken our friends at Celebrity Cruises to make it a cruise route.

Celebrity is offering 11 nights for €1,684pp, on Apex, departing Southampton for Cork (Cobh) on June 27.

And taking in the pride of Iceland, Reykjavik, Isafjordur, Akureyri and making a detour to Kirkwall (Orkney Islands).

They are also offering up to 75% second guest, saving included.

Up to $200 to spend onboard and free parking in Southampton.

Navigating the waters

Now these may be uncharted waters for even the most experienced of cruisers.

But one of the most famous explorers of them all sailed this way 1,500 years ago.

Yes, only the first Westerner to reach America.

No, not that one, Christopher Columbus.

But St Brendan the Navigator who called Iceland the Land of the Smiths on account of the volcanoes.

Now Smithsland would, of course, have been a very different place.

But they’re right about something, there is a light that never goes out in the land of Ice and Fire… and the Northern Lights.

On-board luxury

You’ll enjoy five days at sea when hopefully you’ll get to see sharks just like Bren did back in the 6th century.

So you’ll be able to relax at the cabanas, disconnect at the art gallery.

Play Jenga on the rooftop garden, dance away at the club or pamper up at the salon.

And among the entertainment and culinary spaces we have happy memories of Eden from Celebrity Edge off Florida.

So follow in the footsteps of one of the great seaman, St Brendan the Navigator.

And make this your summer cruise next year… Ireland Iceland Island Fireland

Countries, Cruising

Magellan’s sail 500 years

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Magellan’s sail 500 years. And we will sail 500 more. Yes, it’s half a millennium since Ferdinand Magellan became the first man to sail around the world.

And set in motion the ultimate bucket list, the round-the-world cruise.

Which 450 years later my future Mrs M replicated, albeit another route, and through a now built Panama Canal.

As her family came home on a working ship from her father’s commission in Australia.

Ferdie’s bucket list

For Ferdi, in truth, he didn’t fulfil his bucket list.

He kicked the bucket in the Battle of Mactan in the modern-day Philippines so never did make it back to Seville.

And it was left to Juan Sebastian Elcano to complete the journey.

And isn’t it always the way, you complete the boss’s work and they still get all the credit.

Magellan, we obviously know from school geography and history.

Strait up

And he has his name carved into the map of the world in the Magellan Straits.

The strip at the foot of Chile between the Atlantic and the ocean he modestly named not for himself but the Pacific.

He took the name from the Spanish and Portuguese Mar Pacifico which means peaceful sea.

Now it may have taken 300 years for the first round the world cruise, Cunard’s RMS Laconia, we have been catching up since.

And there’s a swell range of cruises for next year to get away from it all.

Fair winds

So if you wanna stop the world because you want to get off then we’d like to put you onto the cruise specialists.

They’ll do the heavy lifting for you for the Cunards, Princess Cruises, MSC, Royal Caribbean Celebrity Cruises et al.

And that just leaves you to turn off the heating, put the key in the latch and take off.

Because wasn’t that just what Magellan would have done… and he didn’t have any fuel costs to worry about.

Because he worked on wind power, ah… Magellan’s sail 500 years.

America, Caribbean, Countries, Cruising, Europe, Ireland

Fiveday Friday – dip your toe back in outdoor swimming pools

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I’m not sure what the rules are for outdoor swimming pools in Scotland (probably because in the Frozen North nobody ever considered it a thing) but the English are dipping their toes back in today.

Swimming is one of the staples of many people’s holiday although I confess that I spend less time in a pool now than when I was a kid, preferring instead to sip cocktails by the bar.

In some places you can do both. Here are my five top pools on my travels.

Bim-ming pool

Sandals, Barbados: The ultimate in luxury where you can drink your Strawberry Daiquiri in the middle of the pool.

And then swim up to the island pool and have another. OK, waddle over.

A game of volleyball with the ultra-competitive Americans becomes even more fun after all that. You try spiking a ball with a cocktail in your hand.

Visit Barbados, or Bim as the locals call it https://www.sandals.co.uk/sandals-barbados http://www.visitbarbados.org and Let’s rumba in Barbados and My kiss with Rihanna.

To infinity and beyond

Kuramathi, Maldives: And you can’t beat an Infinity Pool where you feel you are swimming right into the Indian Ocean only for the end of the pool to stop you.

You’ll have to get out of the pool to get your cocktail though.

On a one-mile island surrounded by the Indian Ocean you would think you’d be in the sea all the time but I leave that to the fishes.

And instead dip into my own private pool which comes with my cabin and check out the restaurant pools. Where you’ll have company with the island’s herons.

See http://www.kuramathi.ie, https://island-marketing.business.site and Atoll tale – the Maldives.

Dive into Las Vegas

Palazzo, Las Vegas: For many Vegas is all about staying in and making your fortune but then you’d be missing out big time.

Head for the top of the Palazzo hotel on the Strip https://www.venetian.com/towers/the-palazzo.html and swim your little heart out before .

And look down below on the crazy city waking up. See http://www.lvcva.com and Strip… the light fantastic.

And if you see a pair of red-rimmed sunglasses there would you let me know please?

Swimming in the fjords

MSC Preziosa, Norwegian fjords: How’s this for a bracing swim? The Norwegian fjords.

You didn’t think I’d be dipping my toe in the isthmus did you?

But still I was fairly pleased with myself at taking to the pool in the Nordic drizzle while everyone (my professional photographer wife among them) hanging over the side taking piccies.

I never tire of swimming in a pool in the middle of the ocean… surrounded by a metal hulk of a floating hotel https://www.msccruises.co.uk, http://www.royalcaribbean.com, http://www.celebritycruises.com. And The call of the fjords, A Royal Party, Messi around on the water and I’m A Celebrity, Get Me Out To Here.

Tenerife trunk call

La Laguna Gran Hotel, Tenerife: And just what the oul’ limbs need after a hike through rainforests, volcanic parks, arid hills and church towers.

Word to the wise. Be sure that you have someone with you or leave a wedge in the door.

Otherwise you could find yourself not getting back out. On second thoughts you don’t have to be anywhere, so don’t bother.

See http://www.CanariaWays.com, http://www.visitingtenerife.com and A walk through the ages… Tenerife.

PS: The Irish Sssssea

Brave souls. http://www.fortyfootthemovie.com

And an honorary mention to the Forty Foot in Dun Laoghaire, Dublin’s port https://www.dlrtourism.ie which is mentioned in Ulysses.

I’d always admired the locals swimming away in its ripples.

And I dipped in on the hottest day of the year a few years ago and jumped out just as quickly,

MEET YOU IN THE POOL

Tag: http://www.celebritycruises.com

Goodbye to newly wed, overfed and nearly dead cruise cliches