America

My version of a really solid Tennessee excursion

Step aside, partner, it’s my day, bend an ear and listen to my version of a really solid Tennessee excursion.

And I won’t play hard and fast with the route which never went actually through Carolina…

It was western Virginia, although we’re sure that their ham and eggs is mighty fine.

The lovesick sap on the train from Pennsylvania Station in New York to Chattanooga may well have enjoyed his magazine and Baltimore.

But he would have missed the views along the way.

You won’t make that mistake when you visit Chattanooga, which not surprisingly makes the most of its railway heritage.

Tennessee is not very far

Full steam ahead: A Chattanooga choo-choo

With the Tennessee Valley Railroad  putting on year-ride vintage rides for fans of the Volunteer State, of which we are signed-up members.

Now naturally at this time of year the emphasis is on Christmas.

And the Tennesseans don’t let the small matter of being in the Deep South of the US to stop them celebrating the North Pole.

Tennessee Rail Road Valley puts on a Magical Journey with North Pole Limited Christmas Train, a Christmas Tea and Christmas Daylight Express.

You can also enjoy a picturesque round-trip train ride through the Hiwassee River Gorge.

Your carriage awaits: Fine dining

Write a letter and meet Santa and enjoy a delicious gingerbread cookie and chocolate milk on the train.

And just so the big people don’t feel left Santa’s Hiwassee Holiday is just for you over-21s.

With a nightcap with St. Nick, a one-hour train ride with all the bright trimmings of the season.

Where you’ll get two drinks, a sweet and savoury treat box, a souvenir bell, keepsake boarding pass, and a visit from Santa, all for $140 a table for two.

Loop the loop

Santennessee: And it’s looking a lot like Christmas

And because Tennessee isn’t just for Christmas then why not plan ahead for May-late November and the Hiwassee Loop?

You’ll be whisked away on a five-hour journey through the lower Hiwassee River gorge, featuring that loop.

This 50-mile round trip starts at 1:30 p.m. and ends at 5:30 p.m, showcasing the natural beauty and railway marvels of Tennessee ($56pp).

The high point of which is at Farner, where the tracks intriguingly cross over themselves.

As they spiral up the mountain, the only example east of the Mississippi.

The one I call Funny Face

Festive fun: And I’m beginning to look a lot like Christmas

It looks like the Tennessee Valley Railroad has taken care of everything.

Well, maybe not a certain party at the station, satin and lace, I used to call funny face.

Guess, I’ll take her with me this time and maybe branch out to those familiar and memorable destinations from my MLK 50 trip.

And start a whole new my version of a really solid Tennessee excursion

Fly London Heathrow to Nashville with hotel stay at the Hayes Street Hotel with British Airways from December 11-16 from £1,633pp.

Chattanooga is just two hours drive, and the whole of the Volunteer State awaits.

America, Countries, Ireland, UK

John Bull’s Other Island and the Irish Teasock

They’re just not playing ball… John Bull’s Other Island and the Irish Teasock.

How else to explain Irish ‘prime minister’ Simon Harris not being swept up in England’s march to Euro soccer glory?

Eminent Sky TV political interviewer Trevor Phillips dropped the ball (yes, it’s all footballspeak at the moment).

When he tried to chivy Ireland’s leader along in his discussion about the new British government.

By asking him what he thought of England’s progress in the Euros.

Taoiseach’s low block

Poll position: Taoiseach Simon Harris

Of course my old neighbour from my time in Greystones, Co. Wicklow, let Trev’s volley bounce back at him off his wall.

Now politicians and politicos trying to ingratiate themselves with sporting fans rarely works well,

Who can forget Rishi Sunak asking the Welsh public if they were excited about the Euros?

A Euros where Wales would not be playing but fierce rivals England were.

Political football own goals

Telling porkies: Liz Truss

God love them, they try.

But unfortunately our politicians still don’t see that the world no longer wants the sun never to set on their empire.

Or that they ever did.

To be fair, some Brits do take a stab at learning the lingo.

To try to blag that they know, and care, about what Irish playwright George Bernard Shaw called John Bull’s Other Island.

Like former British prime minister Liz Truss’s mangled attempt at pronouncing Taoiseach, the Irish name for their leader?

To be fair, it’s not Lettuce Liz’s fault that she’s not of the diaspora.

A Brit of Oirish

Our bodies are a temple: Temple Bar

You can, of course, tell the true Brits in any airport heading to Ireland by their stag and hen Oirish merch.

And thankfully avoid them too by steering clear of their meeting place, the overpriced Temple Bar on the banks of the River Liffey.

Which, of course, I’m doing as I board my Ryanair red eye and head over for a catch-up with travel friends at the Shelbourne Hotel on Stephen’s Green.

It’s certainly one way to block out the hysteria greeting England’s arrival in the Euros final by our neighbours.

Biden his time in Ireland

Say it ain’t so Joe: Biden and Trump

Our talk with our American guests in the Shelbourne at the annual US Soiree in Dublin will doubtless be about their elections.

And being the wide-eyed liberals we will. Of course, be wildly sympathetic to Joe Biden’s travails.

And not mention his loose pass when he visited his ancestral home a couple of years ago.

Some like it Scot: With Marilyn in LA

And mistook the New Zealand All Blacks for the hated British regiment from the Irish War of Independence, the Black and Tans.

Of course, the Irish have such a love-in with America that they instantly forgave him.

Particularly as he was playing hard ball with Britain over a trade deal at the time.

And knowing that whatever his frailties he would always know about John Bull’s Other Island and the Irish Teasock.