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No, we’ve long been lured to Iceland and all points up in the compass, but it transpires that we should just stay put as 2024 is the year of the Northern Lights.

If it seems that everyone you meet now has seen the Northern Lights in their back garden it’s nothing to do with climate change…

That’s just an optical illusion.

It’s just that apparently we’re in an eleven-year solar activity cycle which the boffins have predicted is peaking this year.

Northern Lights of Old Aberdeen

Top class: Aberdeen University Graduation Day with Mum

Now it’s clearly a selling point to say that you’re an ideal location to see the Aurora Borealis.

And my old stomping ground of Aberdeen in the north-east of Scotland has even written the heavenly dancers into their town song.

Now I saw plenty of stars swirling above my head during eight years in the Granite City

But that was probably the demon drink.

And I never once saw flashing lights, unless, of course, they were police cars, fire engines or ambulances.

All of which were known to turn up at our student house after our all-nighter parties.

Land of Fire and Ice

Not that we would ever want to put you off heading to the Land of Fire and Ice where they’ve probably got better and more frequent light shows.

Or Tromso and Svalbard in Norway, Swedish and Finnish Lapland.

With the latter in Rovaniemi also boasting the added attraction of Santa.

And Ilulissat, Greenland.

Of course, our travel providers have long since known the co-ordinates to see the best places in the skies.

Jet set

Jet2Holidays is offering a sample three nights from October 6 from Newcastle Airport.

Just down the road and over the border from my base here in North Berwick.

Staying at the Hotel Klettur (B&B) for a discount price of £1,040 for two.

A Northern Lights tour is included and naturally will start at night, at 9pm and will last approximately three to four hours.

Now, you might see the Northern Lights this week from outside your window.

But even if you do, won’t it just pique your interest for more.

Particularly as 2024 is the year of the Northern Lights.

Africa, America, Asia, Countries, Europe

Northern Lights mania

11th May 2024 funtime65

So in nearly nine years in Aberdeen, ‘the home of the Aurora Borealis’ I never saw them once but now in my little rock at the top of Europe and across the continent there is Northern Lights mania.

OK, so I was messing in science in school so don’t really follow any of the reasons for this phenomenon.

But here goes… the arrival of a Coronal Mass Ejections from the sun can cause the annulus to expand, bringing the aurora to lower latitudes.

That Aberdeen has dined out on the boast of being ‘the home of the Aurora Borealis’ is mainly due to the salesmanship of concert pianist Mary Hall.

A Brummie no less, who never set foot in the Granite City, but who wrote the song with her husband Mel for a homesick Aberdonian, Winnie Forgie, who they befriended.

Heavenly dancers

The ‘Heavenly Dancers’ as they are known in these parts were once again celebrated when Local Hero, a Burt Lancaster movie mostly set in Aberdeenshire, just up the coast became a cult hit in the 80s.

The story being that an oil baron switched his plans to pump the North Sea for fuel in favour of building an observatory after falling in love with the area.

Those who have seen the Northern Lights say that it’ll do that to you.

Of course, while people up and down the country and across Europe are claiming to have seen the Northern Lights from their back gardens the best place to view them is in remote areas.

And in spots unaffected by street lighting.

Now while we bask on this British island and wherever you live Dark Skies resorts cater for us at other times of the year.

Tenerife star trekking

Now you’ll have seen the Tenerfenos protesting the overtourism on their island but that’s mainly in the southern hotspots.

The real jewels on the Canarian island are in the interior, the west coast and the volcanic peak in the north that is Mount Teide.

Europe’s most visited national park there is still plenty of space for us all to trek.

And as for stars, you’ll get an unspoiled view too of the milky way and Saturn’s rings from the top of Tenerife.

Night out with stars in the States

Now when you think of a night out with the stars in the States you immediately think of Hollywood.

And yes, that was one takeaway from a week in LA LA Land.

But while there at the American Travel Fair, IPW, I was introduced to a wider galaxy of stars.

Utah really is more about the Milky Way than the Mormons with the highest concentration of International Dark-Sky Association-certified areas.

The Salt Lake State boasts 26 International Dark Sky Places within the state.

That accounts for 13% of the 200 locations around the globe formally recognized by DarkSky International.

Utah is also home to the first international Dark Sky Park, Natural Bridges National Monument.

Jordan jewels and Moroccan marvels

Of course, the desert is always a go-to for reaching for the skies.

And Wadi Rum in Jordan is designated an international Dark Sky Reserve.

Which means that you can spot stars that are over 100 times dimmer in Jordan than in your home town.

While if you find yourself inconvenienced in the Moroccan part of the Sahara Desert then what else is there to do?

Than watch the cycle of the night and day and shooting stars in Fezland while you’re shitting stars.

MEET YOU IN THE SKIES

Countries, Sport, UK

Tee up for Trump it’s grand

1st May 20231st May 2023 funtime65

You’re a hardy soul to play golf in Aberdeenshire where the wind will blow your drive right back to your feet.. believe me. And rich too to tee up for Trump it’s grand.

The Donald is back. Of course, he has never been away, but back in his mother’s homeland of Scotland and he is loving the attention.

It’s not just the Scottishness and a love for Aberdeen that I share with Donald Trump.

I’d like to say that I was there at the start of his journey back in 2016 when he was elected.

I was travelling through the night to get to Disney World in Orlando.

And naturally when I arrived it was Donald I most wanted to meet… and eventually did.

I’ve already discussed the similarities between The Donald Trump and The Donald Duck here.

Their luxuriant heads, big mouths and Scottish heritage… remember the clan McDuck.

Quackers golf

But I’ve yet to explore their shared love of golf which we all know hails from Scotland.

Duck fans will know of The Flippered One’s exertions on the course from Donald’s Golf Game in 1938.

When his nephews Hughie, Dewey and Louie play tricks on him.

Not dissimilar from The Donald’s game.

Or your favourite blogger who in trying to channel his inner Tiger Woods in Aberdeen only succeeded deep in the woods.

And also one gusty New Year’s Day invented his own shot when he boomeranged his drive back at his own feet.

While attempts at the Old Course in Cannes on the French Riviera only resulted in a broadside from members of the club.

Because I didn’t shout Fore… and here was me trying to go native by exclaiming Quatre!

Scotland, of course

Back to the Donald’s daily and you’ll be wanting to know how much it costs to get around his Scottish courses.

Well, the country membership for a new member for Trump International joining fee is £1,000 including VAT*

And an annual country membership fee is £1,995/£176 per month including VAT*.

And for Open golf rota course Turnberry where it will cost your £2,500 a season.

In addition to premier amenities, membership at Trump Turnberry includes exclusive member access to our 19 Trump Golf properties, both domestic and international.

Now in addition to premier amenities, membership at Trump Turnberry in Ayrshire includes exclusive member access to our 19 Trump Golf properties, both domestic and international.

And that includes courses in his own state of New York, his adopted state of Florida, Doonbeg in Ireland and all around America and the world.

So tee up for Trump it’s grand.

And easy to get to with all major airlines flying into Aberdeen and Glasgow Prestwick.

Countries, Europe, UK

Cor phew it’s King Charles

11th September 202211th September 2022 funtime65

Keep your eyes peeled the next time you’re in Greece because you might just have cause to exhort… Cor phew it’s King Charles!

Because the Greek island of Corfu off the coast of Albania is only the new king and his queen consort Camilla’s favourite holiday bolthole.

And seeing that Charles has probably been around the globe more times than we’ve had hot dinners then it’s worth exploring.

And that is exactly what us honeymooners, the lovesick Mrs M and myself, did 28 years ago.

Little knowing its significance in royal circles.

But getting a glimpse of its idiosyncratic British leanings with its cricket pitch in the capital Corfu city.

Phil’s back yard

Do you want to go to Greece on holiday? Liz and Phil

Royal watchers, of course, know that the Greek island is the home island of Prince Philip.

And that the Duke of Edinburgh had a lifelong love of cricket.

His first born Charles veered more towards polo and skiing and would go off piste on the slopes.

With Verbier in Switzerland a favourite where he spent many of his happiest family times with his sons and Diana.

But it was to Corfu that he took his second wife.

Again those who have been following his life in photographs over these years will recognised his love for Greece.

You dancer

And here Mrs M has a claim to fame as a former Royal Photographer of the Year.

Charles can be seen in kodachrome doing his best Zorba with locals in Crete.

And again that’s obligatory from king to commoner when you holiday on any of the Greek islands.

And yes guilty to that too… I blame the Metaxa brandy.

I dare say that our new King would have handled any water sports rather better than yours truly.

As I ended up swallowing large gulpfuls of the Aegean.

Aberdeen love retreat

My Aberdeen castle: Well Huntly and it’s someone else’s

Now while the future King and his Queen Consort chose Corfu as their love getaway, it wasn’t where they honeymooned.

That was in Birkhall in Aberdeenshire.

And where did we return to from our honeymoon in Corfu… only Aberdeen where we lived and loved (too much information) for four years.

And where I had studied and started my first scribblings as editor of the student newspaper Gaudie.

Before going on to meet my beloved, a photographer on my first paid-for newspaper in Reading, Berkshire… just down the road from Charles’s childhood home.

I guess we’re due to meet then on holiday where yes, the corny side will get the better of me and I’ll exhort Cor phew, it’s Charles.

Countries, UK

Keep Scotland’s green flag flying high

27th July 202227th July 2022 funtime65

No, the Jocks haven’t merged with the Irish though we have before under Edward Bruce, but we do keep Scotland’s green flag flying high.

The old joke goes, and it’s interchangeable for Scotland, Ireland and Wales, that God was handing out the countries.

He showed the Scots a land rich in nature with inventive and artistic people.

To which the Scot naturally thanks the Almighty but asks why he has been so giving to them.

At which point he reminds them of who their neighbours are.

Now this might just get you through the mania of England’s Lionesses football team’s European Championships run.

Thistle do nicely

Scotland is indeed a verdant country and on seeing one riverside valley in Dalriada, St Mungo, he named it Dear Green Place, or Glasgow, in native Gaelic.

My wee country has been rewarding those communities (and my green-fingered friend among them) with cherished green flags.

And there are a few among them I’ve passed a pleasant hour or dozen.

And even worked, to the absolute amazement of our tiller and plougher, The Scary One.

The Northern Delights

Aberdeen: Aberdeen I know, I know its soil, it’s under my nails from working its links.

And it’s from here, in Hazlehead Park, that Keep Scotland Beautiful announced 85 of our green spaces achieved the international Green Flag Award.

Now green spaces for university students meant naturally drinking on the lawns.

And while Alex Ferguson’s gloried Giants of Gothenburg went through their paces in Seaton Park under the Hillhead Halls.

We went through the tinnies… and binned them afterwards and went on to glory in the Granite City.

The Garden of Edin

Edinburgh: It’s not always the showpiece gardens then that need honouring.

And while locals and visitors alike wonder at the Floral Clock and backdrop of the Castle from Princes Street Gardens Greater Edinburgh’s a green place too.

And when it came to naming houses for the Son and Heir’s first primary school in St David’s in beachside Portobello…

They opted for the district’s parks, Figgate chief among them.

The Law’s a grass

Dundee: For reasons best known to only us we call our big hills laws from our Gaelic tongue.

There’s one here in my new temporary home of North Berwick, east of Edinburgh.

But it’s the Dundee version which I’m flagging up here, and the organisers are too.

And it’s here that I would ascend daily on a busman’s holiday to the Tay city.

And stare in wonder from the Law at the architectural majesty of the Tay Bridges joining Dundee to the Kingdom of Fife.

My Dear Green Place

Let Glasgow Flourish: The Botanic Gardens

Glasgow: The West End of Glasgow has oft been known as aspirational where the city’s merchants decamped.

With its seat of learning, its university, art gallery, and grand houses the West End is in direct contrast to the impoverished East End.

Its arterial road is the boulevard, the Great Western Road, off which the Victorian Botanic Gardens is the meeting place for West Enders.

Nae taps aff here.

Yon greeny banks

Loch who’s here: A wise old owl and a birdie

Helensburgh, Loch Lomond: And It’s water, water everywhere in the famous freshwater lake.

But, of course, Loch Lomond is framed by lush lakelands.

And after a childhood of days out to the coast and Helensburgh I saw first hand the pride its citizens had in their parks.

Lying down on the job: The green-fingered one

Take a bow the gardeners of the 100-year-old urban park, Hermitage Park.

And all our gardeners and 85 honoured gardens, particularly Mrs M and hers which should be on the list.

Countries, Culture, UK

How many Ukrainians can Buckingham Palace take?

16th March 202216th March 2022 funtime65

You do the math, but with 775 bedrooms how many Ukrainians can Buckingham Palace take?

The Queen has moved back, of course, to Windsor Castle in Royal Berkshire.

Which means it’s free.

And even someone of her considerable wealth could do with the £350 per month government payment for taking in a Ukrainian family.

It would all help to pay her second-born’s settlement with Virginia Giuffre.

A day at the palace

Of course nobody gets into Buck House for free, unless your titled or entitled.

So it’ll be £30 of your pleb money for a visit to the State Rooms or £55 when it’s Combined with a Royal Day Out.

And that’s the State Rooms, The Queen’s Gallery and the Royal Mews.

We’ve been down this route before flagging up the royal palaces around the UK which you can visit.

With the Palace of Holyroodhouse at the foot of the Royal Mile in Edinburgh an old favourite and former neighbour.

How to explain the British reverence, fascination and obsession for the Royal Family?

It’s a combination of tradition, pomp, ceremony and soap opera.

Tourist magnet

And it is perhaps the biggest draw for tourists to the UK.

The experts, of course, are the guides who have an unrivalled knowledge of the history.

Whether they’re the Beefeaters at the Tower of London or the guides at the Palace of Holyroodhouse.

And while your Beefeater is stiff and proper there’s a twinkle in the eye of your Edinburgh guide.

A bloody royal tale

Maneater: Saoirse Ronan as Mary Queen of Scots

And he will cheerfully walk you through the story of the murder of Mary Queen of Scots’ favourite David Rizzio.

You’ll be invited into the Queen’s Chamber where the Scots lairds (that’s lords) killed the Italian in front of the queen.

And wend your way down the spiral stone staircase where the guide will point out to you and the impressionable American and Asian party…

Of the blood embedded in the stones.

I swear I saw a brush protrude from his satchel.

Haggis farms

Us Scots are noted for our dry deadpan wit and another example springs to mind of how the guides play with their party.

When Stevie apologised to the Irish party I was with in Aberdeen.

That we were running late and would not be able to visit the haggis farm.

And I had to prompt him later to put them right in case they wrote about the haggis farm in their articles.

Armoured and dangerous: And knowing smiles

So maybe it’s best to leave that question I set at the outset to the guides who know as much about the royal residences as the queen.

How many Ukrainians can Buckingham Palace take?

America, Countries, Culture

Pride and joy

8th June 20218th June 2021 funtime65

The Tarts and Tramps was always a rite of passage for Aberdeen University Freshers students in the Eighties, and I dare say it’s their Pride and joy still.

Quite whether students get a chance to glam and glum it up in a meaningful Freshers week in September remains to be seen.

But encouragingly Pride events will be held around the world this month.

Changed from last year when we all rallied together to make the most of it all digitally.

My attention was drawn by one of Las Vegas’s finest music acts, Imagine Dragons, championing Pride.

It just so happens that I’m at my campest in the Oo-Es-of-EH and the

Cariqueen and it’s that love of a good pun which makes me fit right in.

By rights we who travel for a living would have been boogieing it up in Party City.

That is of course Las Vegas, where I should be now at the US Travel Fair.

Their Pride party is legendary as is their entertainment.

With the Beach Boys and Snoop Dogg entertaining us last time up in Anaheim.

And OneRepublic rocking Red Rocks in Denver the year before.

We’ll hopefully do the American Travel Fair all over again in the Fall.

Where, yes, Pride will be behind us.

But I know someone from my last Vegas trip, Cami from Utah.

My Pride and joy, who I might just still be married to!

Asia, Countries, Deals, Europe, Oceania

Aussie, Aussie, Aussie Day oi oi oi

26th January 20211st August 2021 funtime65

G’day my Antipodean friends and good to see you’re able to celebrate it publicly. Aussie, Aussie, Aussie Day oi oi oi.

Which no doubt Smutley, Brownie, PC, Roscoe, Brad et al will mean getting shitfaced.

I never got to Australia but Australia got to me in the Eighties when I did back-to-back Oktoberfests in Munich.

I had booked me a seat and a bed (which were pretty much the same thing) on a ten-day Topdeck bus trip to Bavaria.

But innocent abroad that I was I neither knew that Earl’s Court in London was an Aussie enclave nor that Top Deck was an Aussie firm.

Aussies in Aberdeen

Forward fast three months and the Hilton district of Aberdeen was also an Aussie enclave.

When Smutley and Brownie turned up and asked to stay for the weekend…. and stayed for a year.

And they brought their pals too much to the pleasure of the female student population of Scotland’s Granite City.

Aussies abroad

Now Aussies show us the way when it comes to travelling and Topdeck know what’s most important to them.

That it’s cheap and cheerful, and my two Oktoberfest trips at just £84 were the best value holidays I have ever purchased.

Now knowing that you’ll want to get back out on the road when all this virus eases up Topdeck have you covered.

European odyssey

Of course we can’t jump in a Topdeck machine to go back and get 1985 prices but they are offering 25% off.

Spirit of Europe is an 11-country, 24-day odyssey starting and ending in London coming in from £2,193 down from £2,924.

You’ll see England, France, Monaco, Switzerland, Italy, Austria, Hungary, Poland, the Czech Republic, Germany and the Netherlands.

Japanese promise

All roads lead to Japan this year with the Olympics, or at least this one road we hope.

Japan Highlights is a 12-day tour leaving and returning to Tokyo, down from £3,278 to £2,485.50.

Indian treasures

While if India is more your thang… Namaste India is a ten-day trip, starting and finishing in New Delhi, down from £1,429 to £1,071.75.

And if you should ask the whereabouts of the person you first meet on the bus and he says he’s from Perth…

Then it’s Perth, WA, not Perth, Scotland… ‘and we’re all from Australia or New Zealand, mate.’

Happy Australia Day, mates.

And while we’re here a rousing call to arms from the original Aussie singing superstars The Seekers and I Am Australian.

And tell me too your fave Aussie bands and singers.

So, altogether now… Aussie, Aussie, Aussie Day oi oi oi

Countries, Culture, Food & Wine, UK

Brew’s up – the perfect Covid beer cure

3rd January 20214th January 2021 funtime65

The Blood Service give you a cup of tea and a chocolate digestive but maybe they’ll now follow Brewdog’s lead of giving beer after a Covid vaccine shot.

The Aberdeenshire beer chain have come up with an inventive and public-spirited way of getting us all to get our shots.

I’ll take all four

They plan to throw open their closed bars as vaccination centres.

And they have asked the public for help in naming the new vaccine-themed beer.

As a steer they have mocked up a Vaccine Canteen, Little Prick, Community Immunity and Jab Lab.

All good, but why in the 13 years I was away from Scotland did we start saying jab instead of jag?

Breweries are a staple on tour itineraries and it is always welcome to sample a region’s or a brand’s beer.

I’ve sent many a Wish You Were Beer message from my travels around the world.

And listened through the spiel from the Master Brewer about the mashing process and the like.

And prayed silently that nobody would ask a question which would require an answer that would eat into the drinking time.

The same goes for any vaccinations.

I mean, do you really want to be left waiting for your complimentary beer because somebody is firing off questions.

That would be a little prick.

BrewDog Dog Tap in Ellon, near Aberdeenis one if your more accessible brewery tours.

And you get an insight into what must be one of the better places to work.

You can bring your per to work… and, oh, all that beer!

Countries, Culture, Europe, Ireland, UK

Haunted houses – Dracula and Scotland

31st October 202031st October 2020 funtime65

I can’t recall what brought my short-lived Cubs career to an end nor much about what we did in the Scout Hut, but I do remember the Haunted House next door.

In these less innocent and imaginative days haunted houses seem to have gone out of fashion.

But the ghosts and ghoulies haven’t gone away, and with all of us consigned to our houses these days you’d better not have been ignoring them.

Bram Stoker was certainly alive to their presence and spirited up the Dead when he was inspired to write Dracula on a visit to north-east Scotland.

And placed the nocturnal room in Slains Castle in Cruden Bay as the dwelling of one Count Dracula.

As spooky houses go it is certainly more frightening than the lot in a Dublin shopping centre where you’ll find Bram Stoker’s Castle Dracula Experience.

Although much like his crypt if you delve inside you’ll find there’s lots to sink your teeth into.

Dublin’s Bram Stoker Festival is always finding new ways of reinventing themselves and they’re billing this year’s digital offering as a Grave New World.

Which is what we’ll all be doing too, turning our homes into Haunted Houses… and The Scary One and her Mini-Me have been dressing up for the part.

Now I don’t know where the Scout Hut is in my new hometown of North. Berwick but my mother-in-law never sees a guising.

And here’s an Irish Halloween blessing to keep away the gremlins…

At all Hallow’s Tide, may God keep you safe,

From goblin and pooka and black-hearted stranger

From harm of the water and hurt of the fire

From thorns of the bramble, from all other danger,

From Will O’ The Wisp haunting the mine,

From stumbles and tumbles and tricksters to vex you,

May God in His Mercy, this week protect you.