And we’ll go full Hobbit and take a second breakfast and elevenses today and get talkin’ the talk on Tolkein Day.
Much like The Son and Heir when we decked him in felt cloak and feet and curly wig to watch The Lord of the Rings when he was but a hobbit.
The Great JRR was born on this day 132 years ago in Bloemfontein, South Africa, but reared in Birmingham before professoring at Oxford.
And ever since 1969, and the foundation of the Tolkein Society, Tolkeinites (or Ringites) have been raising a tankard to JRR.
John Ronald Raoul (and who isn’t intrigued to know what an author’s initials stand for?) moved with his family to Edgbaston when he was 4.
Brummie Bilbo
So that’s where we’ll start.
With the words of Bilbo Baggins… ‘step onto the road, and if you don’t keep your feet, there’s no knowing where you might be swept off to.’
And that’s Secret Birmingham who point us to Hall Green, Moseley, plus Edgbaston and Ladywood.
You’ll visit his childhood at 264 Wake Green Road, no hole in the ground this and with many careful owners since, so don’t go in.
And Sarehole Mill which inspired The Old Mill in The Hobbit.
And Moseley Bog where Tom Bombadil lived, nay lives if you’re a Ringite, and the trees talk.
Edgbaston Waterworks tower will be recognisable as Minas Morgul, the home of The Witch King.
And Perrott’s Folly which Ringites will know as Orthanc, home of Saruman.
A tankard of Hobbiter
All thirsty work so you’ll want a Middle-Earth inn.
At the Plough & Harrow where Tolkein stayed a night before going to France to fight in the First World War.
And a blue plaque proudly adorns the outside.
Now, we know that there was a long, long unexpected journey there and back for Bilbo, and Frodo.
And so it is with our odyssey.
Hobbit Haka
It takes us next Down Under to New Zealand, or what we’ll call Peter Jackson’s New Zealand for our purposes.
Makes sense really as New Zealand, outside of the cities, is often compared to Olde England.
Matamata, or Hobbiton as it surely means in Maori, is a two-hour drive north of Auckland on NZ’s South Island.
With the Hobbiton Movie Set 15 miles from Matamata.
Or you can sign up to one of the many coach trips from Auckland or Hamilton or Rotorua or Tauranga.
We’re advised that it can take eight hours to get around Hobbiton.
Around the time it will take you to get through the trilogy.
Hole lotta fun
Of course, every Ringite will want to channel their inner Bilbo, Frodo, Sam, Merry or Pippin.
And be that hobbit in a hole in the ground… and you can with a quarter of an hour in Bagshot Row.
Now knowing that hobbits are by instinct lazy, who like a second breakfast, a pipe smoke and a tankard then you’ll want to too.
And you’ll get the opportunity at a Second Breakfast Tour or Evening Banquet Tour.
While for those of you who like a drink you’ll be glad to know your tour finishes up at the Green Dragon Inn.
Where you can imbibe in a complimentary drunk from the Hobbit Southfarthing range.
It encompasses two traditional ales, or an apple cider or non-alcoholic ginger beer.
Second breakfast of champions
Now reading Tolkein as we all know is hobbit-forming.
And as a mere Bandanaboy I gorged myself on The Hobbit, The Lord of the Rings and for real nerds, the pre-prequel, The Silmarillion.
And Farmer Giles of Ham and the Adventures of Tom Bombadil.
Which gives me the authority to be talkin’ the talk on Tolkein Day.
And you’re welcome.
MEET YOU IN HOBBITON