Asia, Caribbean, Countries, Deals, Europe

Are the world’s best hotels the world’s best for you?

Congrats Capella Bangkok, voted best place to stay, which triggers a question are the world’s best hotels the world’s best for you?

Now, I’m usually content with a three-rolls bed, a power shower and a hearty breakfast.

But I can be won over by bells and whistles too and a killer view.

Ah, Capella

Water view: Capella Bangkok

All of which Thailand’s jewel, the Capella, has in spades in its 101 suites and villas.

Described as an award-winning new-age sanctuary perched along the meandering bends of the Chao Phraya River.

With a two-night reservation at the Best Available Rate in any room category to receive a complimentary third night.

So what other special features separates the Capella Bangkok from the rest?

The Capella helpfully offers daily breakfast for two guests, a bottle of house Champagne and daily sunrise yoga by the river.

Daily complimentary non-alcoholic mini-bar.

And here’s the real kicker… complimentary pressing of up to five pieces of clothing per stay!

All for TBH 75,300, or 1,712 of your Earth pounds.

Sandals in the swim

Hi, hi black bird: In Sandals Barbados

Now no vista can be replicated but those special features can and we’ve enjoyed them around the world at other hotels.

And dare we say… better.

So, let’s start with sunrise in Sandals Barbados.

Where you can be greeted with your very own Bim bird who will perch on your hot tub as you soak.

With glass of Champagne in hand from your complimentary daily bottle.

Toast of Barbados: Morning stiffener

Other drinks are available obviously from your complimentary alcohol maxi-bar.

Now should you struggle to get through that bottle by yourself you can always share with your pals down in the pool.

Or have cocktails in the island pool bar before swimming up to your room.

And if you’ve forgotten anything your personal butler will have seen to it for you.

Your inner Robinson Crusoe

Thumbs-up: Porridge and Janelle at Castara Retreats in Tobago

Now should you think someone of your standing shouldn’t be asked to share your pool then Kuramathi in the Maldives obliges.

With your own secluded pool outside your bedroom with views of the Indian Ocean obviously.

While if you’re looking for something even more exotic and authentic why not go for what we’ll call the Robinson Crusoe upgrade.

Put your back into it: Tobago yoga

Sleep in your very own hammock on the balcony at ‘Porridge’ and Janelle’s Castara Retreats in Tobago.

And for a morning stretch allow your yoga specialist to lead you through some gentle moves.

Porridge in the morning: With Janelle and ‘Porridge’

All of which goes to show that luxury can be just around the corner which is, in fact, the Tobagonian pledge,

Your hotel, your stay

Keeeeep dancin’: With Judy Murray

And if it looks like they don’t have a hotel near you on the World’s 50 Best Hotels here.

There could well be an alternative, just as good, or better, on your doorstep or a quick flight away.

Which is why we would never dream of staying anywhere else than George and Amal’s favourite stop-off, the Dylan in Amsterdam.

Yes, we can have passed down a list but are the world’s best hotels the world’s best for you?

And so as we see that the Gleneagles in Perthshire, Scotland makes the list.

We prefer to recommend Andy Murray’s more intimate and welcoming pad, the time capsule Cromlix House, near by, in Stirlingshire.

Game, set and match to us.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Countries, Deals, Flying

The Mile High Club

In 30 years with my own jet-setter I’ve only ever been to bed with one person on a flight, and it didn’t qualify for the Mile High Club.

Now neither bald boy Brian nor I, a beardie bandanaman, would have ever have chosen each other as priority sleeping partners.

Flying high: Onur, Bandanaman and Brian

But lying next to each other on the fold down beds in Turkish Business class was, of course, a treat.

And with a full belly and a woozy head from the flowing fizz we had the sweetest dreams.

And landed refreshed and ready for the Maldives but that’s another story.

EasyJet loving

Signalling: Flirty flighing

All of which daydream recollections came flooding back when learning of the overamorous pair.

Who were chucked off an EasyJet flight to the Balearics.

A case of woah, we’re going to Ibiza, all right.

Now the Mile High Club came to be known over the years as the ultimate expression of cocking a snook at authority.

 

And who can forget the tale of Michael Hutchence supposedly making sweet music with Kylie Minogue on his knee?

Underneath a well-placed coat.

These days, of course, cabin crew would certainly pull up such behaviour on the grounds that the seat belt light was on.

Loo love ya, baby

Cabin fever: High jinks at the National Museum of Flight

The alternative, of course, the rest room would require the dexterity of Harry Houdini.

Yesterday’s airplane loos must have been more spacious affairs.

While passengers would also have been able to enjoy that post-coital cigarette too as smoking was allowed too.

And even encouraged as you can see if you are fortunate enough to board a Concorde as we are at the National Museum of Flight, near North Berwick.

And see the dainty ashtrays provided for the great and good who went supersonic.

One can only imagine which of the famous celebs enrolled in the Mile High Club when they went transatlantic on that bird.

Suite loving with Etihad

Glass act: Etihad living

Today it requires a little more imagination and a lot more money to get into the Mile High Club.

By either flying on your own private jet or booking a private suite.

Now we’ll leave you to do the heavy lifting here.

But we’re told that they can range from $7,000 to $12,000 for a one-way trip and can even reach up to $23,000 depending on the amenities.

Loving in Residence: Elite air travel

And it’s probably no coincidence that it’s pitched at the dollar market.

We’re told too that Etihad’s Residence, a three-room suite, can cost around $32,000 for a trip from Abu Dhabi to New York.

Perhaps outwith our loved-up couple’s budget who’ll likely face a hefty fine and ban for their few minutes of fun.

 

 

Countries, Sustainable Tourism

Save our seas (and travel) on World Oceans Day

Oh, I do like to be beside the seaside, which is why I want to save our seas (and travel) on World Oceans Day.

Living on these northern European islands, Britain and Ireland, all my life global warming always seemed to be happening somewhere else.

Until that somewhere else became somewhere I came up close and personal to, when I made travel my life’s mission.

Barbados beaches

Bim life: On Barbados

My old uni pal, party animal, conversationist and conservationist, Jevan first flagged up to me its threat to the Caribbean.

With ocean warming a real and present threat to the sea-life and island life.

Of course, at the height of the Barbados Crop Over carnival, the message perhaps didn’t land as it should have.

But it did eight years later, on my return to Bim, when I looked out of the plane and witnessed the seaweed on the coast.

Water life: Club Barbados

An eye-opener, of course, but worse still when denied the chance to swim on some stretches.

Unless you want to try to wade through the reeds, as I did, and ended up with it in my mouth.

Now the larger hotel chains have the wherewithal to clear the coastlines in a way smaller businesses have not.

The seahorse has bolted

Idyll: Kuramathi

Of course, any cleaning and clearing up exercise feels very much after the seahorse has bolted.

Because these smaller islands, atolls and countries around the world are being hung out to dry by the richer stronger states.

Who give lip service and pledges at COP summits before rowing back on them.

Atoll order

Ocean apart: The Indian Ocean

For every Barbados though there are those for whom the clock is ticking even louder.

The Maldives are a dream destination for couples and globetrotters.

But as the flattest country in the world at just 3ft elevation they are more susceptible than anywhere to rising sea levels.

The Union of Concerned Scientists report that the teardrop isles, made up of 1,200 atolls and home to around 540,000 people will dwindle if we don’t act now.

Because a rise of just 1.5 feet will see them lose around 77% of their land area by 2100.

Flat out: The world’s flattest country
All worth reflecting on as we buggy, around the Maldives and swim, snorkel and scuba dive in the Indian Ocean.
 
That we might not be affording that luxury to our great-grandchildren.
 
Now we may feel powerless to effect our favourite coastal destinations’ future.
 
And these countries do rely on our visits to sustain their economies and their future.
 
We trust then in our cruise companies and airlines to prioritise sustainability and cleaner fuel.
 
What we can do though in this biggest election year in history.
 
With four billion people, half the population of the planet, going to the polls… is VOTE.

Because if we don’t exercise our democratic rights in this cycle we only have ourselves to blame.

Motion of the ocean

My home: And keep it cool for the turtles
 
 
 

 

America, Caribbean, Culture, Deals

Thanks a reptilian

Ever since that snake tempted Eve they’ve had the worst wrap but today is their day when we say thanks a reptilian.

And reflect that we seek out our slidey pals around the world.

How else do we explain our endless fascination with the biggest reptile of them all, the donosaur… and nothing slidey there.

Now for an extinct species Dino doesn’t half get around.

And he has adapted to our modern world, taking to the climes and surrounds of Florida and California.

Where he has been known to like petting at Universal Studios Hollywood and Universal Orlando.

Dino saw it

Here Dino: Universal Studios Hollywood

While kids, and big kids alike, love to pore over their bones.

At any number of museums around the world where they are the centrepieces.

Now we all know about the Natural History Museum in New York.

With its own underground stop for those rainy days to entertain the kids and keep them dry.

Dino pals: At the Yale Peabody in New Haven

Dino, we all know looms large in the movie A Night At The Museum.

But did we know that Yale Peabody Museum inspired Jurassic Park author Michael Crichton and that New Haven in Connecticut is Dino central.

Now the big fella and his pals seem to have a habit of following us around.

Slide up: The Maldives

Where it’s reassuring to know that you can mingle with dinosaurs at the Witte Museum in San Antonio, Texas.

While brunching on barbecue and Margaritas.

And Dino’s pals

Turtle peace: Barbados

Now there are millions of reptiles between Big Dino, Terry and Tessie turtle in Barbados.

And Mother Turtle and Gordon the Gecko, my own wee pal from the Maldives.

And they all deserve our respect as they form a key part in the natural cycle and are friendlier than you’d think.

So thanks a reptilian to all of you on your day of appreciation.

From lizards, snakes and chameleons through alligators, crocodiles, tortoises and turtles.

 

 

 

 

America, Asia, Caribbean, Countries, Europe, UK

Where to wave your palms

Thank God that Jesus isn’t making his triumphant entry today, it would be all big foam fingers… but I digress, here’s where to wave your palms.

First things first though and a little background on Judean palms.

The kind which the Judeans waved at Jesus as he entered Jerusalem on his donkey.

His little donkey: Jesus greeted by palms

Which usually we would be brandishing only this year our new Nigerian priest could not lay his hands on.

Understandable as palm trees are in short supply in the frozen north of Scotland.

Gigha a palm tree

Scotland, really: The isle of Gigha

Although you can find some in parts of the west of Scotland.

And the tiny isle of Gigha, warmed as it is by the North Atlantic Drift.

And which boasts a Palm Beach and without the crowds in the three in America, the seven in Australia.

One in Jamaica, Aruba, Algeria and Malawi.

My boat comes in: In the Algarve

And we’ve been lucky enough to recline by palm trees from the Caribbean.

To the Canaries through Portugal, Turkey and Jordan to the Maldives.

Our Easter Judean palms, and remember Palm Sunday is always the Sunday before Easter, are actually date palms.

Sarong, but so right: The Maldives

Unbeknownst to us but educated now, thanks to the enlightening site Vividmaps, there are ten widespread species.

The most common of which is the coconut and which proliferate in Barbados.

Bajan life: And a palm tree, of course

Although despite the abundance of roadside stalls selling coconuts and coconut water it is surpassed.

JBy Mexico, Costa Rica, Cuba, Puerto Rico and Trinidad & Tobago in that region.

The most populous palm tree country is somewhat surprisingly Colombia with South America dominating the list.

And Brazil, Ecuador and Peru occupying second, third and fourth spots.

Papua New Guinea (or should that be Palmua?) is in fifth.

Florida flow: Fort Lauderdale

While America is only seventh although in states like Florida and California they’re on every beach.

Now we’ve all got things to do so I’ll leave you with Vivid Maps to fill in the other countries.

Anyone for Venice Beach: California

Suffice to say that the palm tree will always retain a special place in every tourist’s heart for exotic climes.

So whether getting your holy leaf out today inspires you.

Or it just warms you to see them gently fluttering in a summer breeze on a clip.

Then we’re happy to share where to wave your palms.

 

Asia, Countries, Europe, Sport

Anyone for Raducanu and Maldives

So where has Britain’s sporting darling gone… well, anyone for Raducanu and Maldives?

Emma I think it would be right to say can do with some time out of the spotlight.

And that is what last year’s US Open tennis winner is getting with her engagement in the Indian Ocean atolls.

Emm-meet and greet

Oh OK then: Emma’s invitation

Emma will share her skills and pro tips with guests at Amilla Maldives Resort and Residences on Baa Atoll from 25 October -2 November.

Emma will give a 60-minute tennis clinic at the resort’s jungle-clad, US Open-standard tennis courts.

She will also attend a meet-and-greet and just like any other 19-year-old is excited about going out to the teardrop isles.

She said: ‘I’m delighted to discover the Maldives for the first time. I will have an amazing time there.’

Kings and queens of court

Off Pat: Rafter is a fan

Baa Atoll has become something of a magnet for the cream of tennis.

With former World No. 1s Angelique Kerber and Pat Rafter and Olympic gold medallist Sasha Zverev and Davis Cup winner Viktor Troicki all gracing its courts.

And those of us who have been out to the Maldives have always been mighty glad to have an alternative to water sports.

Because as enjoyable as they are, if like me you weren’t born with a snorkel in your mouth scuba diving doesn’t come naturally.

Howzat!

Lounging around: In Kuramathi

And you’ll be glad for a game of football or cricket with the staff as I did in Kuramathi.

And cool down later in your own infinity pool.

All of which should appeal to the jet set tennis player.

Something of which I got to know when we signed up for a Judy Murray masterclass in Quinta do Lago in Portugal.

Ace

Bandanaman is coming: Emma

And that’s the beauty of it for us and the scrutinised tennis star, here’s an escape from the humdrum of home.

Anyone for Raducanu and Maldives… I know I am.

 

Asia, Countries, Sustainable Tourism

Turtles within touching distance

They’ve been flirting with me the heroes in the half shell but here’s a tail (sorry) of turtles within touching distance from my old Maldives stomping ground.

And when I say stomping I mean when I got pooped off the shore of Kandolhu and had to stand for a breather.
Noooooo! It’ll cut your feet but worse than that, it’ll kill the coral.
My snorkelling skills have improved since then until I got within touching distance of the turtles off Bridgetown, Barbados, last week.

Turtle fans: In the Maldives

They’d surely be proud of me out in the Maldives.

And perhaps with a little work off my homestead in North Berwick, Scotland, I could get on a very important expedition.

What the doctor ordered.

Dr Stephanie Kohnk is the lead scientist for the Olive Ridley Project and author of the International Union for Conservation of Nature’s Maldives National Red List Assessment on the Hawksbill Sea Turtle,

And she is heading up a pioneering genetic research expedition to study the local Maldivian hawksbill sea turtle population.

Shadow snorkelling

Jump on board: Close and personal

Guests at Patina Maldives, Fari Islands, can shadow the Doc on a unique snorkelling expedition.

They will be given a morning guided tour of the research vessel.

And they will reveal the painstaking planning and specialist equipment involved in frontline marine biological research.

Guests will get in on the first stage of the expedition on a turtle snorkelling trip led by Dr Köhnk.

Adopt a turtle

Goggles on: And hit the sea

And to further support this pioneering research and conservation initiative they can adopt turtles included in the study.

Adoptees will be able to name their turtle.

And they will receive future re-sighting alerts.

And enjoy priority access to updates and insights from the project.

As part of the joint venture ‘Oceans First’ ethos from 1 June, a sea turtle biologist will be stationed on-island at Patina Maldives.

They will act as a guest educator; overseeing rescue efforts for any sea turtles that become entangled in so-called ghost gear in the area.

And they will support ongoing photo identification and population monitoring in North Male Atoll.

It is only home to the second largest turtle database in the country.

I ain’t afraid of no ghosts

I recognise them: Patina

The Patina Maldives team, along with its Fari Islands neighbours, also contributes to the ongoing removal of ghost gear from the ocean.

And that provides Olive Ridley Project with valuable data.

That can be used to trace the origins of discarded or abandoned fishing equipment.

And also help tackle the problem at source.

Because we all need our heroes in a half shell under the sea, our turtles within touching distance.

Countries, Europe, Flying

Turkish Airlines’ 12-hour flit

You pack the box in and pull down the car boot but the glass smashes… this house mover should have asked Ilker Ayci, mastermind of Turkish Airlines’ 12-hour flit.

If you’re in the middle of a house move and wondering how you’ll get it all done in time then check out National Geographic’s documentary which showed this week.

And see how TA moved 5,000 workers and 47,300 tons of materials (that’s 33 football pitches) from Atatürk Airport to Istanbul Airport in 2019 in half a day.

Mega relocation

In there somewhere: At Turkish Airlines H

The national flag carrier paused all flights for 12 hours for the ‘Mega Relocation’.

Throw in 12,000 parcel and some 1,000 vehicles and what you have amounts to a military exercise.

I’ve had the pleasure of enjoying TA’s hospitality both at Ataturk and Istanbul Airports.

And had the privilege of being invited behind the scenes at TA HQ and even got to fly a plane myself.

The pilot episode

The simulator gave me the chance to fly in over the Hudson at JFK Airport in New York.

And to witness the rescue operation complete with slide and ice pool where the staff learn the drills.

In truth, if you’d been on my plane and had me as your pilot you’d have needed to know how to slide and plunge.

As I overshot the runway and skidded off it.

It’s always best to leave it to the experts.

TA is the business

Boy Racer: In Turkish Airlines Business Class

And TA is the world’s fourth largest flight network and flies to 315 international destinations in Europe, Asia, Africa and the Americas.

And that makes it the largest mainline carrier in the world by number of passenger destinations.

Anyone who has flown with TA will have enjoyed the experience thoroughly.

I’m driving this: In TA Business Class

And particularly if you’ve treated yourself to their world-beating Business Class with its Flying Chef and sleeping booths.

You’ll appreciate it if you happen to be en route to one of their long-haul dream destinations like Kuramathi in the Maldives.

The layovers of layovers

Playing my tune: TA Business Class

And the airport layovers to beat all layovers.

The Turkish Airlines Business Lounge where you can drive on the range (I’m safer there), the model fast cars, go the cinema, have a nap and massage.

And eat, drink and be merry.

And to think they did all this on Turkish Airlines’ 12-hour flit.

America, Asia, Countries

Treat her with caviar

You do some strange things on the eve of surrendering the single life (no, not that) but I wanted to treat her with caviar.

Thing was that this was out in the sticks and so the first taste of Beluga would have to wait.

For when mes amis would invite me to the French Embassy in Dublin.

I ended up becoming as much a fixture as Le Tricolore outside the Fitzwilliam Lane maison.

Truth is there are other French delicacies I’d prefer and I’m still exploring them.

Wear your caviar

Now unless you’re a sloppy eater (guilty!) you’d never let a bubble of caviar slip from your mouth.

Only rubbing it onto your skin is actually good for you.

And better still if a masseuse with sensual hands is rubbing it into you.

And while my shoulders are tensing up at my desk didn’t this survey drop into my inbox from wellness specialists CFAH.

Maldives masseuse

Wham hammam thanks palm: In the Maldives

The Maldives are all about luxury so it shouldn’t surprise you if such a masseuse is on hand.

And there is at the St. Regis Maldives Vommuli Resort.

Where for $750, you can indulge in a three-hour treatment, the Caviar Journey, that uses anti-ageing properties of caviar extract.

Feel the wrinkles, spots and scars fall off.

It involves an exfoliation, a magnesium massage and a lavender bath.

With champagne and caviar, of course.

But still not as dear as…

Chilled: Abu Dhabi

 

Yes, even Caviar in the Maldives isn’t the most luxurious treatment out there (though it’d do for me).

Because Abu Dhabi is offering A Day of Gold, which was, of course, featured at the World Spa Awards.

For $1,150 you can experience a luxurious gold Hammam and the spa’s signature Palance Massage.

And once hammamed then Goddamn… you’ll be back.

The Fabu Dhabi treat includes a small lunch (only small?) before you get indulged in a 24-Carat Gold Radiance Facial and a Bastien Pedicure.  

Or this Beverly Thrill

Be at one with nature: In Beverly Hills

 

And in the land that time forgot Californians think nothing of splashing the cash to hang on to their youth.

The Peninsula Spa Beverly Hills offers a 120-minute long high tech facial for $1,500 (costing you $12.50 a minute).

This facial is described as a six-in-one treatment that uses cutting edge technology to ‘enhance’ and ‘enrich’ the skin.

It aims to stimulate and tone your inner skin to reveal it’s inner glow.

Because once you’re out with the beautiful people… 

Dubai high

Ya dancer: Dubai

But the spa of spas is at the Talise Ottoman Spa at Jumeirah Zabeel Saray in Dubai.

Where for $6,800 you’ll get a 24-Karat Gold Mask.

The treatment also includes an argan oil massage and a luxury skin softening milk bath.

It’ll leave you looking radiant with a natural glow. 

Tip top treatments

All tip top treatments I think you’d agree.

And just a word with one very close to my heart a masseuse remember to tip the ones with the magic fingers.

 

Countries, Culture, Europe

Flying turtles to the Canaries

And let’s not be shellfish here that someone else is getting abroad, that Aer Lingus is flying turtles to the Canaries.

No lateral flow tests, no 72-hour PCR test, no passenger locator forms…

Well, this turtle is Canarian.

Julius Caesar (stay with me here) has been kicking his stubby feet in Co. Down, Northern Ireland, for the best part of a year and a half.

The loggerhead sea turtle washed ashore in 2019.

Hail Caesar

Crate expectations: JC gets the deluxe treatment

Julius Caesar, thus named by the Donegal family who found him because of his fighting spirit, has been recuperating in Down.

At the Exploris Aquarium in Portaferry where they have put the poor fella back together again.

JC was just three months old when he was swept along the current (and who hasn’t been there).

And he was carried along the Gulf Stream to Co. Donegal.

Donegal diver

Just the ticket: And it’s Turtle luxury on Aer Lingus

The poor wee thing was underweight, just under a few hundred grammes, and suffering from hypothermia.

So it was just as well that it was Donegal where he was found.

Because Ireland’s most northern county boasts the warmest people in the world.

OK I’m biased as my Dear Old Mum and her people are daughter and sons of the sod.

The Ulster folk are famous for their hospitality as anyone who has enjoyed their ‘wee’ Ulster Fry will testify.

Turtle’s Ulster Fry

Turtle loving care: And the crew is besotted

So it’s no surprise Donegal’s fellow Ulsterians filled JC up.

Those pounds piled up on a diet of fish mixture, squid and gel.

Just a thought here but I might just have been a turtle in a previous life.

As I’ve got on famously with them in Barbados and in the Maldives.

Well, after 20 months being pampered in Ireland the day finally came today for JC to head home to the Canaries.

And when you travel from Ireland you need to promote the national airline carrier.

And of course Aer Lingus was only too happy to fly JC on the EI 782 to veterinarian Pascual Calabuig at the Tarifa Wildlife Recovery Centre on Gran Canaria.

Turtle on board

It’ll take longer: The swim back to the Canaries

JC’s minder Portia Simpson is going along for the company.

Our turtle, now weighing 25kg, is protected in a specially designed waterproof crate.

I can only say the best things about Aer Lingus’s flight experience… and the same can be said for turtles.

JC is not the first turtle that Aer Lingus has repatriated.

Another rogue loggerhead turtle, Leona, was found in Co. Clare in 2013 and transported to Las Palmas, Gran Canaria by Aer Lingus in December 2014.

This is your pilot speaking

Next time I’m flying: And i’ll choose Aer Lingus

Pilot Captain Peter Lumsden introduced the VIP to the passengers.

‘It is our pleasure to welcome aboard a very special passenger today and to ensure the safe transportation of JC the Turtle to Gran Canaria.

‘Keeping the turtle’s temperature above 19 degrees is critical to his wellbeing and he requires regular monitoring and shell lubrication so placing him in the aircraft hold was not an option.

‘Like all of us on the flight today, I’m sure he is looking forward to the warmer climate upon landing.’

Turtle minder

And so say all of me. The Canaries are a pleasure any time of the year, but especially in the late summer after a year in cold storage.

So the next time Portia needs a hand, then I’d be happy to fly turtles to the Canaries.