You know Christmas is coming when… the latest Ross O’Carroll Kelly book hits the shelves and he coins another killer pun like Game of Throw-Ins of Andora’s Box.
And as it happens the new Ross book hits the shelves this Friday… and I’ve already told Santa that, roysh, I want that.
The Ledge is back
As well as a Beamer with one of the Seoige sisters (or both) sprawled over the hood.
Andorra was where Ross decamped when he had to get out of town.
From the looks of it Ross is having to make the most of things these days in Bray, the old-fashioned Co. Wicklow resort I know so well.
Although I prefer the luxury of leafy Powerscourt in nearby Enniskerry.
The Sugarloaf frames Bray
Back to Andorra.
And In truth if you do during the winter you’ll not be able to hook a T bar or ride a gondola without bumping into someone you know from Dublin 4..
If you want a taste of Dublin’s Rugbyland and walk in the Rossmeister’s footsteps then the InterCon is where you’ll stay.
And he’ll no doubt have a thing or two to say about Ireland’s win yesterday against Scotland.
Pyrenees please
Andorra is an ideal country to get the skiing kick.
And Pierre & Vacances are all over the Pyrenees with more than 455 rooms and apartments.
It is adding to that with two new residences in the Pyrenees, Hotel Austria and Residence Andorra Degas.
Deal me in
Hotel Austria… but in Andorra
Hotel Austria boasts 62 rooms and is just 1km from the Peretol ski resort.
The Degas Apartments are right on the doorstep to the skiing, just 750m from the Grandvalira slopes.
A seven-night stay at the Hotel Austria at a flexible rate, arriving on March 13 is from €395/£358 for a double bedroom with breakfast included.
And a week at the Andorra Residence Degas is from €757/£685 for an apartment that sleeps up to three. Flights and transfers not included.
I’ve looked up at those Pyrenees from my post-Lourdes tour so this is unfinished business.
And watching the Scary One plant her pear trees in the drizzle for National Tree Week has sparked memories of where I’ve been out of my tree around the world.
Let’s hear it for the beardies… on Barbados
Beardy trees
Caribbean: The trees certainly caught the Portuguese mariners” eye when they landed in Barbados..
Not the golden beaches, interestingly (well they have their own) but their bearded Ficus citrifolia.
While we all visit the West Indies for its beaches we miss a lot if we ignore its heartland so you should go safari.
Where Dwayne will tear up the woodland in his Jeep and the bowed bearded trees will flick your face.
Eat one of those famous Tobagonian meals of fish which has just jumped out of the sea and macaroni in Jemma’s Treehouse.
And sleep it off in your own treehouse in Castara Retreats in a hammock naturally.
Tree si
Bergamo is a poplar destination
Italy: And my favourite is this much-loved straight up and down tree… it’s very poplar.
My good friend and an Irish Travel Writer of the Year into the bargain, Muriel Bolger, wrote beautifully for me on their appeal, on a trip I sent her on to Northern Italy.
Which I checked out for myself in Bergamo this past Autumn.
And for many a parent the go-to Christmas present for kids (and maybe vice-versa) was a football top.
My most memorable was, and this is pertinent in a week when we lost Diego Maradona, La Albiceleste.
Or the sky blue and white stripes.
Truth was that my attempts at long hair never came close to the chic cool of the hero of that year’s World Cup, Mario Kempes.
And physical evidence still exists in a picture album of a rather angst-ridden teen standing by the tree.
In truth I hadn’t asked for Argentina and would have preferred the Dutch shirt.
And I did rue the day I left the World Cup winners’ top behind in a changing room.
So in recognition of Diego and also to flag up a very good cause comedian Mark Watson’s Kitmas appeal for donations of old football tops here are my five faves.
Which will, of course, draw you to these countries.
Dutch of class
Argentina and the Netherlands in the World Cup final in 1978.
The Netherlands: And it was probably just as well that my parents didn’t give me the Dutch top in the Glasgow of the Seventies.
Because an orange top is identified in Scotland with King William of Orange and the Protestant team Rangers.
And that wouldn’t have gone down well in my Catholic school.
Thing was though that as an eight-year-old and uncluttered by such nonsense I was dazzled by that colour.
And the Netherlands of Cruyff and Krol.
And I did manage to blend in with the Oranje Army when I treated the-then Miss F to a night out.
Amsterdam to Rotterdam where the Dutch beat the Greeks 1-0.
Portuguese man of awe
Team of all talents: Portugal in 1986
Portugal: And while it’s mostly always the top you get sometimes you need the whole shirt and shorts ensemble.
So that Portugal‘s red top with the addition of green shorts becomes the Portugal flag.
Our guide Jose Madomis told us from the off that Portugal in the days of the dictator Salazar was run on Football, Fado and Fatima.
So much so that among all the stands of Our Lady merch in Fatima you’ll find the Portuguese shirt and Cristiano Ronaldo towel!
Moroccan roll
Green is the colour: Morocco
Morocco: And not just because they were Scotland’s last opponents in the finals of a major competition, a 3-0 defeat in 1998.
But because of the lengths I went to to get myself a Morocco top
On my travels in Marrakech. I picked the green one rather than the red.
Where I got roped in by a trader after some pointless bartering.
To buy his threadbare top off his stall for more than its worth.
Which set in motion a tragical mystery tour from Jemaa el-Fna around the souks.
And that was just the start of my rocky Moroccan roll.
Roman holiday
Hotti Totti: Roma legend Francesco Totti
Roma: And we’re still waiting to get to see the Gods of calcio after Dad here promised the Son and Heir a match only to forget his passport.
But we did get a Giallorossi (red, more of a maroon, and yellow piping) top snd pencil case.
It was a time of plague and pestilence when frontiersmen reached out to new peoples in an act of trust.
And it is the best of America, its Thanksgiving Day.
Clouded in myth from what I can see there are two main contenders.
The 1619 religious feast on the English Puritans’ arrival in Berkeley Hundred, Virginia.
And the 1621 shared harvest meal between the settlers in Plymouth, Massachusetts and the Native American Wampanoag people.
Mass gathering
The indigenous people had helped the incomers get through the previous harsh winters.
The feast is akin to a Christmas meal with roast turkey the centrepiece.
And didn’t we all see the turkey get a pardon at the White House last week?… they’re coming back for the bird today.
But while you may go for turkey, mashed potatoes, stuffing, corn, and cranberry sauce if you want to be really authentic then here’s how to party like it’s 1621.
Walk like a Puritan
And If you want to walk like a Puritan then you need to get your hands on waterfowl, venison, lobsters, clams, berries, fruit, pumpkin snd squash.
Now because Thanksgiving is a celebration of Settler and Native-American unity, a fairly rare occurrence these 500 years let’s focus on the First Nations.
And other than getting out on a reservation (and I will) their representative body and my pals, AIANTA are the folks to go to for everything you need to know.
The American story belongs to all those who have settled, been settled or resettled including more than a couple of Murtys and McNultys (my Mum’s people).
While not all got out to the Wild West, I did, as did Buffalo Bill Cody and his Plainsmen. Chief Sitting Bull was already there.
And the first Black Friday had nothing to do with shopping and everything to do with sheeping.
The Scottish Highlanders were only 128 miles from London on Friday, December 6, 1745, when they decided to turn their army around and head back to their sheep.
It was an ill-fated retreat and their English pursuers caught up with them at Culloden, near Inverness, on April 16, and smote them, a thing they did then and very sore.
These days the only injuries you’ll pick up are sore shins in the shopping rush, although this year it’ll be ‘digital finger’.
Your favourite Travel blogger is always happy to take one for the team so here’s my round-up.
Flyday Friday
And it’s not just off-the-rail fashion or white goods that are Black Friday regulars… we all love our airline giveaways too.
Ireland’s national airline Aer Lingus carrier have a headline offer of €100 off for a family of four bringing two checked bags to Gran Canaria in May.
While also flagging up plenty of other sun spots from which to choose.
Ryanair pride themselves on giving more away more often and are championing ‘Every Friday is Black Friday.’
Friday cruiseday
And our floating hotel firms are all about the sails.
Princess Cruises are offering deals with peak season sailings from €769pp through November 30.
They have 14 UK-based voyages from seven to 14 nights, departing between May and October.
Eleven of those voyages will travel round-trip from Southampton to destinations across northern Europe (maybe taking in here), the Med (and this) and the Canary Islands (us too).
The 3,560 guest Regal Princess will be based in the UK from April to October 30.
Fares start at €769pp for a seven-night cruise during peak season and €1209pp for a 14-night cruise.
And they are recommending booking a cruise this weekend and get up to $400 onboard credit and save up to $150 instantly.
And why wait? Because this is what you get and here too.
Friday skiday
Slope off to the mountains, where there’s plenty of social distancing, with Crystal Ski and get €150 off any booking up to April 2022.
All 2020/2021 holidays come with Covid Cover and free amends up to 28 days before departure.
And because Andorra is a favourite of Irish skiers. Depart January 10, stay self-catering in 3* Sant Roma Apartments, Arinsal from €292pps (four people sharing).
While Italy is mine. And why not spend yours in Sainte D’ouix, at the 3* Hotel Martin, half-board, from €544pps.
Offer runs through to Monday. Includes flights from Dublin.
And I’m not stopping there… more Black Friday deals coming up.
And their Black Friday savings of €250 per booking, running from yesterday (my birthday, and thank you) with free amends on Black Friday bookings.
The BLK100 will save you €100 when you spend €1,000, BLK175 €175 when you fork out €2,500 and BLK259 for a spend of €3,500.
Great Aunt Bulgaria
Well, Bulgaria was where we, as a family, took refuge from the cloying, smothering public grief for Princess Diana back in 1997.
Little did we know when we booked our TUI holiday earlier in the summer, and every year then, we’d be leaving behind us a country in an emotional breakdown.
It could, of course, been any sunspot that gave us respite.
But this being Eastern Europe and only a few years after the Iron Curtain there was a sense that She wasn’t the saint here that she was in the West.
Socialistites
They had problems of their own trying to develop a more capitalist society out of state-controlled Socialism.
And it was all too evident on the Black Sea beaches where Russian writing was scrolled on the changing room doors.
And in the main square in Bulgaria’s second city, Varna,, where a customer in front of us in the bank handed over his gun on entry.
While outside old Eastern European women in shawls, baggy jumpers, grey skirts and brown shoes lined the square.
Scales of justice
All with weighing scales in front of them. All of which made me wonder how the old women in the middle ever made a living.
And why this was even a thing.
Happy as a sand boy
Money was tight, obviously, and the driver who took us to Sebastopol waited there all day to collect us.
And turned up at our hotel the next day early asking if he could take us back.
But while it was dear for the locals on Bulgarian wages it was great value for tourists.
Save for another day
And one British couple we met had saved so much on their previous Bulgarian holiday that year they had come back that September for more.
Water thrill: The Aquahotel
We returned, of course, to a Britain grieving vicariously for an idol most had never met.
Not Diana’s fault but an excess of self-indulgence all the same and one well captured in the latest Netflix series of The Crown.
Diana days
Diana’s death and funeral were times we, all of us who lived through them, can remember specifically where we were.
And should you feel the need to jump ship and get out from new madness in the UK then Bulgaria is still a haven and great value.
And particularly with TUI who are offering seven nights all-inclusive on July 5 at the 4* Aqua Hotel Nevis, Sunny Beach.
It’s a deal
Dublin to Bulgaria from 2+1 €2339, 2+2 €3199 (both prices include a free child place).
All part of my old friends‘ Black Friday package of deals for 2021 to signal next year’s bounce back.